The Gift Thief Mishap
by Snapegirlkmf
Summary: When a gang of thieves begins a chain of robberies in Storybrooke at Christmas, it's up to the Nevengers-both old and new-to solve the mystery and stop the crime before the holiday is ruined. Stars toddlers Rumple, Regina, Belle & Killian. Plus a Rumbelle baby! Mishap verse. Sequel to "A Little Fishing Mishap". Rumbelle et al pairings.
1. Holiday Mishaps

The Gift Thief Mishap

By Snapegirlkmf and CJ Moliere

 **A/N: This was written as a request for a reviewer who asked for more Mishap tales. We were going to have this first chapter written in January but it didn't work out that way, so . . . hope you all like! Takes place right after A Little Fishing Mishap.**

 **1**

 **Holiday Mishaps**

If there was one thing Bae dreaded it was fighting the crowds to do the family's Christmas shopping but it was getting close to Christmas and they couldn't wait around any longer.

Killian's list for Santa was a small one but one of the items was a request for meatballs for Christmas dinner since he loved Emma's meatballs and a few toys.

Bae figured that the dinner would be the least of their worries. One of the things he disliked about the shopping trip, besides the fact that there were nasty impatient people who thought they were the only ones in the store, was that holidays were a prime time for thieves to strike unsuspecting shoppers and lift their wallets, cash, credit cards, and other items.

He could recall from his days as a snatch and grab artist exactly how to slip his hand into a harried mom's purse and take her wad of cash, or into a man's back pocket and take his wallet. So quickly they never even felt it . . .until they went to look for their money and found it gone.

Fortunately he and Emma were well prepared should anyone attempt to rob them but those people would also be sorry.

Bae never put his wallet in his pants pockets, or in his hoodie either, only in a special pocket in his shirt, in the front, which closed securely.

He also never carried more than a few hundred dollars in cash on him during the holidays, and though he had an ATM card, hardly used it because he also knew about hackers.

Emma carried her money and the one credit card they had in a small drawstring bag around her neck, where prying hands and electronic readers couldn't find it.

Nowadays electronic readers were the latest weapon of choice for credit card thieves. The reader would scan the card number and save it for the thief to use later, most of the time they used them online since it was easier.

Emma's little drawstring bag was made of special material that blocked the scanner beams, as was Bae's special pocket, which Rumple had sewn into all his shirts.

Belle wanted to do some last minute shopping of her own and invited Donna, Selene, and Peri to join her. Selene needed to visit the baby store.

She took Miri with her this time, because they were going in places where babies were expected and people wouldn't get annoyed if she happened to be crying or the stroller took up most of the aisle.

Also having the baby accompany them would give Selene an idea of what to expect once she had her own. The baby was due in February close to Archie's birthday.

Though Miranda Gold was one of the most happy and sweet natured babies Belle had ever seen, and it wasn't her just being biased because she was Miri's mother. All of the women said so once they met the grinning giggling little tot.

She had her papa's floofy light brown hair that seemed kissed with gold and Belle's bright cerulean eyes. Other facial features were harder to define at the moment, though Belle swore she had Rumple's stubborn chin also.

"I know our baby will be more like Archie than me," Selene mused aloud while the women were at the Victorian looking through the ads for the various department stores they planned to shop in. Donna was still getting used to modern shopping after being a wooden puppet for centuries but the ladies of Storybrooke were helping her adjust.

"Why do you say that, Selene?" Belle asked.

Miri waved a small soft rattle shaped like a rose in her infant seat.

"Just guessing I suppose but I'm not having as many problems as Mum did when she was carrying me...morning sickness and that lot." She laughed. "But I'm craving fish and chips more and I hate fish!"

Belle laughed. "That's normal. I hate spicy foods yet when I was carrying Miri I could eat a jar of hot peppers. And I put hot sauce on everything and made Rumple want to throw up."

"I make Archie ill from some of my concoctions."

"I drove Nick crazy craving doughnuts...he's a cop and he hates them," Peri snickered.

"That's a bit odd." Selene giggled.

"Why?" Belle asked curiously.

"Oh haven't you heard the old cop and doughnuts jokes? I have and so has Nick which is why he avoids them," Peri replied.

"What joke?"

"That cops spend more time eating doughnuts than doing their jobs and it irritates Nick. He works so hard and so do his other brothers and sisters in blue and I get angry when people make fun of them."

Belle frowned. "We all know that, Peri. And we appreciate how well he does his job here. That's just silly."

"It is but that's what we used to deal with in Florida."

"Well, that won't be the case here," Belle reassured her. "If anyone says something like that when Rumple, Regina, or I am around they'll regret it."

Peri grabbed her purse. "Well, I guess we'd better get going before the mob hits the stores."

"True," Belle nodded, then she went to put Miri in the car, which she had heating in the driveway. Rumple had insisted they install an automatic starter, because winters in Maine were hell.

Once they arrived at the mall they were having a difficult time finding a parking spot and the ones that were free were disabled parking spots only.

"Too bad Rumple wasn't here," Peri sighed.

"Oh I've seen people put that sign up in their cars and not have a bloody thing wrong with them," Selene grouched. "Thank goodness I have my comfortable shoes on."

"And it's not too windy," Belle sighed. She was always worried Miri would take a chill.

Inside the mall people were rushing from store to store, several shopping bags hanging from their arms and there were several stores where the checkout lines were long enough that people were even waiting near the store entrances to be waited on and several customers were complaining and cursing.

Belle frowned. This didn't seem like people were in the holiday spirit.

"I'd love to go back to the days when Christmas wasn't so commercial!" Donna sighed. "That little boy on the cartoon knew what he was talking about."

"I thought Christmas was the season of giving. But now it seems like it's the season of buying." Belle sighed.

Now she understood better why Rumple preferred handmade gifts.

"People have forgotten what the holiday is about but not in my family. We go to the Christmas Eve Mass, I have a nativity scene in my yard and we're always sending donations to food banks and shelters," Peri said.

"Rumple and I give to a lot of people, especially the orphanage, and others he knows that don't have much," Belle told them. "We do a tree in the orphanage called the Giving Tree, and a child places a card on the tree with a gift they really want for someone to choose to get them. We also give to the animal shelter."

"So does Archie," Selene murmured.

"Hey you gonna stand there looking stupid or you gonna get outta my way!" a man yelled at them.

"Oh bugger off! We're not in your way!" Selene retorted.

"Watch it, Fatty!"

Miri, upset by the man's tone, began crying. But not her normal fussing tone, she began to scream angrily, her face bright red.

"You wanna shut that goddam kid up!"

Belle, who was going to pick up her daughter, gave the man a glare worthy of an Amazon and snapped, "If you weren't so loud and rude, she wouldn't be crying! Ae you proud of scaring a baby, mister? And insulting pregnant women?"

"And if walking through a crowded mall and crying children bother you so much, why don't you shop online . . . so you aren't subjecting yourself and others to your lack of Christmas spirit!" Peri growled.

"You're lucky I don't have my husband's umbrella or I'd wallop your sorry arse!" Selene snarled.

"You're lucky my husband isn't here or else he'd be giving you a whack with his cane," Belle growled, holding Miri on her shoulder and rocking her. She hated hearing her normally sunny baby howling in fear and anger, and she patted her back and whispered, "It's okay, darling. Mama's here, sweetling."

A security guard approached them. "All right you...leave the women alone or I'll be calling the sheriff!"

The women watched with satisfaction as the man quickly walked away.

The baby quit crying as soon as he was gone and began smiling instead, the smile reminiscent of a certain imp.

"Well now hopefully we won't run into anymore people like that!" Donna exclaimed.

"Yes. Now, shall we find the baby boutique?" Belle said, and she let Selene push the stroller while she carried Miri, so the baby could look around.

 **Page~*~*~*~Break**

At the house Killian and the new Nevengers were watching A Charlie Brown Christmas while Henry was attempting to wrap gifts.

"Henry, that looks like crap!" Killian teased, pointing to the poorly wrapped package containing Rumple's gift.

"Like you can do better!" his brother huffed.

"Grandpa taught me how so yeah!"

"Fine! Let's see it!" he challenged.

"Oooh! It's the Christmas wrapping showdown at the Gold corral!" Bobby hooted.

"You gotta cut the paper cause I'm not allowed to use those scissors."

"Okay. Tell me when to stop," his brother sighed.

He began unrolling some more of the blue moons and gold stars paper, which looked like the old Sorcerer's Apprentice hat.

"There! Now you gotta put the box here." He pointed to the center of the paper.

"Then you bring the sides up like this an' tape em."

Henry copied Killian's instructions, finding the present was much easier to wrap this way. Now why didn't Mom know this? he wondered.

"Now since Gramma's gift is a perfume bottle we gotta do something different."

He grinned. "We're gonna do the box trick. You know how to do the box trick, right?"

"Umm . .. no," Henry admitted.

"You know how?" he asked his friends

They all shook their heads.

"Okay you gotta find me one really big box...then a couple little ones that fit one inside the other."

Henry went to get the boxes. When he returned with them he said, "Now what?"

Killian grabbed the smallest box and carefully placed the perfume bottle inside. "You put it in here first...and tape it up. If ya really wanna be funny you gotta use a lot of tape. Ya know how tape happy Grandpa is." He then grabbed his father's roll of duct tape and sealed the box closed. "Now gimme another one."

"Okay. Here," Henry handed him the medium box.

He placed the smaller box inside the medium one. "Now you gotta keep doin that til you use up all the boxes then wrap it up."

Henry did as instructed, smirking.

"You wanna do this one on somebody else too?"

"Like who?"

Killian laughed. "Granpa, who else?"

"Only in his we gotta put an extra gag in...got any ideas?"

Willie snickered. "Reindeer poop?"

"How about coal? For the one who's been naughty?" Annie suggested. "Dad's always teasing us that if we're bad, that's what Santa will leave us."

"And next year he can give it to someone else."

"This box says Christmas fruit cake door stop" Henry laughed, as he found a box in the recycling bin which had been a joke to Emma from Nick.

"Cool...use it!"

Henry put the real present inside of it and taped the lid down.

"You guys wanna do the box trick on anyone?" Killian asked his fellow Nevengers.

"Dad already knows that one," Bobby said.

"My dad doesn't" Yasmina announced. "I'm gonna do it."

"What if we did it on the Butt Muncher?" suggested Roland slyly. "You know that song "I'm Gettin' Nuttin' For Christmas?" what if we wrapped up a box with nothing in 'cept a note and it said "You got nuttin' for Christmas-cause you ain't been nuttin' but bad?"

The Nevengers grinned. "I say we do it. She's got it comin after she tried to hide poor Geppetto's parents from us," Beth spoke up.

"We can make it all nice and stuff . . .so it looks really cool," Killian giggled.

"Boy is she gonna be shocked when she opens it!" The Professor quipped.

He had Henry wrap up a smaller box with glittery red and green paper and tie a big red velvet bow around it. Then he wrote in his neatest printing-To Sapphira From Your Secret Santa.

"She prolly thinks he likes her or something," Willie shook his head, "Meanie."

They hid Sapphira's gift in Henry's room until they were ready to deliver it.

Then they finished the rest of the gifts and put them beneath Henry's tree.

 **Page~*~*~*~Break**

Across town the man the women had encountered in the mall removed a bag of items from the trunk of his car with a smirk. While the security guard was busy with him, his wife was able to steal several items from the stores that they could fence through a man they knew in Portland.

And these would not be the only burglaries they would commit this holiday season.

They planned to hit several homes in Storybrooke next.

Specifically the wealthiest homes in Storybrooke.

After all, whatever was taken they could easily replace.

And they had money to spare so why not give some to those in need?

In another part of town a man walked down the street with his head bowed, fighting back tears and holding an envelope with his final paycheck from his job that would not be enough to pay the family bills or to buy gifts for under their tree. There was no one he could ask to help them, at least in his opinion.

He would give his family a good Christmas somehow.

He was a hardworking man, had been all of his life both in this world and the Enchanted Forest. He worked at the Wheen and Jowls Funeral Home and he took special care with the people who were brought to him to make certain that when their families and friends came to mourn them, they would look just as they were remembered but it had been quite some time since there'd been a funeral and his boss was forced to make cutbacks. It was difficult for Mr. Wheen to do knowing that Cedric had seven children at home from his first wife and his second wife Evangeline was expecting their eighth. He could have called on his first wife's aunt Adelaide but they were no longer on speaking terms since he'd stood up to her after years of her taunting him that he'd been surviving on her generosity for years. He certainly hadn't enjoyed that arrangement and worked very hard to pay back ever cent owed to her and he'd finally done so a month earlier.

He could have dismissed the family's cook to save money but she'd been with the family for years and he didn't have the heart to send away family. It had been heartbreaking enough when Adelaide wanted to take one of his daughters with her to learn how to be lady...the children arranged for her to take Evangeline instead, who was working in the Brown house as a scullery maid and longed to be lady so that Cedric would love her as he loved his wife. Their financial situation had improved slightly after their wedding with Evangeline taking a cleaning job to help pay the bills and her work schedule still allowed her to spend time with the children. Little did he know he was not the only member of their family out of a job.

"You didn't run into any trouble, did you, dearies?" Rumple inquired softly when the women returned from the mall.

"Oh just some rude bloke who had the nerve to call me fat," Selene said. Archie's eyes narrowed to slits. "You can relax love, I think little Miri here may have deafened him."

"Good!" the therapist growled. Nothing angered him more than people insulting his friends.

"These shopping malls are like our markets back home and just as mad!" Donna exclaimed.

"I'm glad you didn't go out on Black Friday, Mama. That's when they're the worst," Geppetto said softly.

"Well all of you need to scatter so we can wrap these," Belle shook her finger at the men. "And no spells to peek, Rumple."

He gasped in shock and placed his hand over his heard. "I would never..."

"Oh yes you would...off you go!"

While they waited, Rumple gathered up all the ingredients they would be using to make cookies later on in the evening. Miri watched from her carrier with interest.

Rumple smiled at his daughter, an idea forming in his mind. Miri loved to watch her parents cook and she would be in for a wonderful show that evening.

Half an hour later Belle called the men back into the living room, the presents wrapped and safe from prying eyes. The other couples bid the Golds goodnight and returned to their homes.

Rumple stayed in the living room with Miri watching Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer while Belle was in the kitchen making gingerbread cookies. She was on her guard while she was baking, knowing her husband was a notorious cookie thief and had been since their days in the Dark Castle, snatching them up whether they were finished cooling or not.

Not wanting a swat from Belle's spatula, Rumple tried desperately to resist the temptation to snatch one of those delicious gingerbreads and dip it in a cool glass of milk but seeing his daughter sniffing the air and cooing made it much more difficult. Out of the corner of his eye he saw his wife setting the first batch of freshly baked gingerbreads on the rack to cool while she prepared the second and had a suddenly inspiration. He crept into the kitchen while Belle's back was turned and grabbed one of the cookies off the tray, racing back into the living room. Miri's small hands reached for it.

"Watch this, dearie…" he whispered and waved his hand over the gingerbread.

The tiny cookie began to run across the Queen Anne coffee table.

" _Run, run, run as fast as you can._

 _You'll never catch me, I'm the gingerbread man._

 _I ran from the baker and his wife too._

 _You'll never catch me, not any of you…."_ Rumple sang.

Miri giggled.

" _The baker made a boy one day_

 _Who leapt from the oven ready to play._

 _He and his wife were ready to eat_

 _The gingerbread man who had run down the street…."_

The cookie jumped onto Rumple's arm and ran up his shoulder, swatting at his ear.

" _Run, run, run as fast as you can,_

 _You'll never catch me, I'm the gingerbread man._

 _I ran from the baker and his wife too._

 _You'll never catch me, not any of you…."_

"All right Rumple, I know you took one…oh!" The cookie was now dancing on the edge of Belle's teacup when she walked into the room. "Oh how cute!"

The cookie blew kisses at her.

Miri applauded from her father's lap and the cookie leaped into the air back onto the coffee table. It grabbed several Hershey's Kisses out of the bowl and started juggling them. Once Rumple finished singing he waved his hand over the cookie and turned it into a plush toy her size.

"There you go, dearie," he said softly. "Now you have your own gingerbread man."

Moments later she was asleep, her tiny arms hugging her new friend.

 **Page~*~*~*~Break**

Over at his son's house, Henry was keeping Killian entertained while his parents wrapped gifts in the bedroom.

"Okay, Gold...we're gonna play a game to liven this wrapping thing up a bit," Emma said with a smirk.

His eyebrow arched. "Oh? What kinda game?"

"Just a little truth or dare..."

"Keep talking, Swan..."

"We either tell truths or take a dare...anything goes."

"Anything?" He was liking the sound of this.

She nodded. "And once you promise . . .you have to keep your word."

"You wanna start?

Emma crossed her arms over her chest. "What was the clothesline thing?"

"Dare!" Bae cried.

"Okay smart guy...I dare you to reenaact it."

"Aww dammit! And I thought I was gonna get out of it."

"Fat chance, Gold. You took the dare so you gotta do it. Now pay up!"

"Ummmm...don't I get a say in this?"

"No. You agreed. Anything goes. So pay up, Gold, or you're gonna be spendin Christmas on the couch. Shoulda put you there last year because you were too lazy to help me put the toys together!"

He looked away guiltily. "And of course I had a ton of people laughing at me after you posted your little love note on Facebook...not to mention getting my ass handed to me by Papa both as a kid and an adult!"

Emma couldn't help smirking. "Don't do it this year and you won't have anything to worry about," she mock scolded.

"God, I'm gonna have to drink a ton of Red Bull or Monster!"

"Those are no good for you. Just ask your papa for some of his energy potion."

"I take that and I'll be running the Indy 500 without a car!"

"Hmm . . .might be interesting. Seriously, though, just sleep during the day and then you'll be rested enough at night."

He laughed. "Fine. Now about the clothesline thing..."

"Wait. Lemme go pee, before I wet myself," Emma laughed.

Bae rolled his eyes. _Why me?_ he thought mournfully.

Bae was hoping she'd spend a long time in the bathroom because he wasn't enjoying having to relate an incident where he acted like a complete fool and his father was not too pleased with him either.

Thinking back on it now, Bae realized his children, though they got into their little mishaps, were not as reckless as he was in his youth.

 _Oh yes, I was the Jackass, before Jackass..._ he thought ruefully.

Bae wondered how the hell Rumple had lived with some of the insane things he'd done without going utterly mad, beating the spit out of him, or having heart failure. Maybe there was something to be said for having a low key personality.

Bae knew that some therapist would have tried to chalk up some of his stunts to an unfulfilled need to "prove himself" to others, because of his papa's reputation, but really some of the things he had done weren't out of any desire to prove anything to anyone, but done just to see if he could get away with them.

 _Admit it, Gold. You were a hellion . . .and you got that little quirk from Milah._

Someday he would have to ask his papa if at times when he was growing up, Rumple never wished for a son who was more like him-quiet and obedient.

Well, mostly obedient, Bae amended, recalling some of the pranks his papa had pulled during his second childhood.

 _It all started when he'd been asked to hang the wash out on the line while his father was weaving blankets to sell at the market the following week. Bae never enjoyed having to do laundry, he preferred playing._

 _And in their yard was a tree he was itching to climb._

 _The trouble was, it was too high for him to climb himself but he'd heard one of his friends talk about men who used ropes to climb trees. He glanced up at the clothesline and smiled._

 _Maybe I can get up there with this..._

 _His father had the line tied to two of the smaller trees with a stick in the middle so that he could raise and lower it when needed and Bae recalled where his father kept the shears he used for gardening._

Bae laughed now, wondering why his father hadn't mentioned how Killian's accident with his fishing pole on Father's Day was eerily similar to what they both called the 'clothesline incident."

 _He grabbed the shears and cut the line down, tying one end of it to a fishing hook and threw the other up around the shortest branch of the tree._

 _Now I'm gonna get up there! he thought and attached the hook to the waistband of his breeches._

 _As he was struggling to pull himself up he could hear tearing and suddenly his backside felt cold._

 _Just then his papa came out of the shack._

 _Rumple's eyes widened in disbelief and shock. "Bae! What in the name of all the gods are ye doin', lad?"_

 _His son was-hanging from a clothesline by the seat of his breeches-which had torn and the whole village could see his backside!_

 _"Ummm...ummm...tryin' to climb this tree..."_

 _Rumple nearly swallowed his tongue at that brilliant reply. "What? That's fifteen feet and-and-Baelfire, are you tryin' t'drive me into an early grave?! What in bloody blue blazes were ye thinkin'? Or not thinking, I should say?" He shook his head in disappointment. "Ye could have been KILLED! As it is now you've torn another pair of breeches-and-those are the new ones I just made for you!" He gasped angrily._

 _"Ummm...Ummm...I'm sorry, Papa..."_

 _Rumple put a hand to his head. Then he muttered something that sounded suspiciously like, "Gods of Light grant me patience!" He gazed up at the clothesline and back at his son. "Just what were you tryin' to do with my clothesline, young man?"_

 _"Climb the tree," Bae answered, feeling that his backside was going to be more than cold that evening._

 _His father gave him one of those Looks-the kind that usually withered him where he stood. "And just what were you planning on doing after you did so? How were you gonna get down? What if you fell? What if you were stuck up there?_ _ **I**_ _couldn't get you down, boy, I can't climb anything!"_

 _Now Bae felt like a fool. He'd KNOWN that but in his recklessness he'd forgotten it._

 _Rumple ran his fingers through his hair. "Bae, when will you learn to THINK before you act? Now look at what this foolishness has cost you-you've ruined my clothesline, your new breeches, almost hurt yourself, and nearly gave me a heart attack! Plus the laundry still isn't done!" He tapped his foot on the ground._

 _Bae stared at his shoes. "I...I'll do the laundry Papa."_

 _"Oh you will, dearie," his father agreed. "And that's not all you'll be doing." He unhooked the waistband of his son's breeches from the fishing hook and helped him to the ground. "Go inside, take off your breeches and put them in the mending basket. Then I want you to sit and think about what you did, how wrong it was, and what might have happened because of your foolishness. I'll be in as soon as I fix the clothesline." Then he added sharply, "You're in serious trouble, young man, and this better never happen again."_

 _Bae shivered knowing that when his father said the words 'you are in serious trouble' it always constituted a spanking that Rumple always said hurt him more than his son. Bae had trouble believing it then but after having to do it many times himself to his own son, he realized how true it was._

 _Rumple watched his son walk into the house, then began to pull the clothesline down, muttering a small prayer as he did so. He adored his son, and hated the punishment he was going to dole out, but deliberately putting himself in danger was one of the few things that Rumple had decreed would earn his child a spanking, though he refused to use a switch or a strap the way his own had upon him._

 _Bae was waiting for him in the cottage, sniffling._

 _Rumple went and got a chair that was usually left in a corner of the room. It was a chair kept for guests, which they hardly ever had, and so was rarely used. Except for occasions like this, he sighed. Then he beckoned to his son with a finger and disapproving sorrowful eyes._

 _Bae came, dragging his feet. "Papa, I'm sorry."_

 _"I know. That's all well and good but it doesn't change things," his father said._

 _"But . . .I'm ten . . ."_

 _Rumple's eyebrow arched. "What's that got to do with it? You're also old enough to know better. Or at least I thought so. Seems like I was wrong, wasn't I?"_

 _Bae looked away in shame._

 _The spinner exhaled sharply. "Bae, I hate punishing you as much as you hate being punished. But it's my responsibility to correct you when you do something wrong. And sometimes the corrections sting, so it reminds you to think before you act."_

 _"I'll do better. I promise! I don't wanna get spanked!"_

 _"And I wish I didn't have to spank you. But you deliberately put yourself in harm's way, and you knew that." Rumple's jaw set. "So . . .as much as I don't like it, better a sore backside now than a broken head later." He sat down in the chair._

 _The spinner could have simply hauled the boy across his knee and commenced with the punishment, yet he deliberately did not do so, allowing his son to draw the conclusion that his own behavior had consequences and those consequences must be faced, and to submit willingly to them. He never wanted Bae to resent him or think he was unfair when he issued punishments-the way he had always resented Malcolm in the back of his mind._

 _Ashamed and feeling guilty, Bae gave in, knowing he deserved it._

 _Afterwards he gave the boy a hug. "I love you, Bae. Please don't make me do this again."_

"...And I NEVER ever did anything that crazy again!"

Emma was rolling on the floor laughing hysterically. "Oh my God...I can just see it..."

"So when Killian got his hook caught in Papa's pants it made me think of the clothesline thing. Just surprised he didn't bring it up."

"My stomach hurts now...Bae..." As she lay on the floor, her lips curved into a wicked smirk. She waved her hand and a line with a fishing hook came down from the ceiling and attached itself to the back of his jeans, pulling him up off the floor.

"Hilarious, Mrs. Gold!" He griped. "Now let me down!"

She wriggled the line. "Not yet. Just a little more..."

"Emma!" he gasped. "You little tease! Have you no shame?" He groped for the hook, wriggling deliciously.

"I like Bae's butt and I cannot lie..." she sang as the hook glowed with magic.

"You're unbelievable!" he groaned. "I just hope the doorbell doesn't ring or the baby wake up . . ."

"Oh come on you stupid hook...ahhh that's it..." she murmured, seeing a small tear in the back of her husband's jeans.

"Dammit, Emma . . .if you want to see my ass . . ." he wriggled harder, thinking that he was lucky today's cloth was made sturdier than when he was a boy.

"Shake, shake shake that booty!" she catcalled.

"Honey, I swear when I get down from here, you're gonna be doing some shaking all right . . ." he mock-growled, smirking. Damn Levis!

"Well since you put it that way..." She waved her hand again and the line and hook vanished, along with the rest of his clothing while she lowered him to the floor.

"Abra, abracadabra...I wanna reach out and grab ya!" snickering, she pinched his butt.

He drew her to him and kissed her passionately. "Guess what, sweetheart?" he whispered into her ear. "I think Christmas came early!"

"It certainly did...but oh what would your papa say if he found out I was using my magic like this?" she purred.

"I don't wanna know, and I'm not telling!" he grinned. "Because what goes on in my house stays in my house."

Then he kissed her again and murmured, "Let's make some of that old black magic, princess."

"Now you're talkin, Mr. Gold and youuu'll shake me all night long!"

"Mmmhmm . . .with my Love Potion #9," he crooned, then he pinched her backside provocatively. "Sassy witch!"

"Rhiannon rings like bell through the night and wouldn't you love to love her?"

"I certainly would!" Bae cried and tackled her into the bed.

 **Page~*~*~*Break**

Evangeline Brown walked back to the house she shared with her husband and seven stepchildren fighting back tears. She'd loved working for Mrs. Parker. She was a sweet elderly lady whose only family was a daughter and son-in-law who never visited and were not even in the house an hour after she'd passed away before they started talking about what they were going to do with Mrs. Parker's fortune.

"Your services are no longer needed," Vicki Parker said coolly.

"But….but…."

"We're selling the house. There's no need to have you around if there won't be a house to clean now is there?"

She nodded silently, gathered up her things and started walking home. She would have to find another job. Cedric's income simply would not be enough to support their growing family and it would be a cold day in hell before either of them groveled before that old trout Adelaide Stitch again! She could still remember the grueling 'training process' the old woman put her through to teach her how to be a lady. She hated the way she was made to dress, speak and act, she sounded horrible and phony but Cedric had seen through all of that. In his mind she was still the same and it was impossible for either of them to deny their true feelings for each other once that awful Selma Quickly was out of the way.

"Oh Nanny McPhee, I wish you were here to make things better for us again," Evangeline sighed.

 _If you want me, but no longer need me, then I have to go._

She knew their friend was out there somewhere, improving the life of another family as she had theirs. Though they were still having a difficult time financially, they were one of the wealthiest families in Storybrooke with the love they had for each other and helping families learn how to love one another had always been Nanny McPhee's mission.

Now the couple sat in Cedric's study on the loveseat together, his arms around her.

"I still have a bit left in the bank…it's not much….and we can sell some things in the house…" Cedric began.

She knew he was referring to some items left behind by the first Mrs. Brown, many of them antiques. "I'm sure Mr. Gold could give us a reasonable price."

"But…Cedric….we agreed those things would go to the children!"

"She would understand."

"But the children….would they?"

"There's no other way….until we find work…our children must have a Christmas!"

"Only small things they won't notice first, Cedric," she suggested.

Little did either of them know that Mrs. Parker was the kind of woman who never forgot a kindness, especially the kindness of the young woman who took time out of her busy schedule at home to look after her and brought some of her wonderfully behaved stepchildren to visit while she cleaned the house and cooked the meals. At that moment, while the Browns were making a list of the first Mrs. Brown's items to sell, Vicki Parker and her husband were seething with rage. Mrs. Parker did not forgive a slight either and eighteen years of silence had been enough of a slight to motivate her to change her will, excluding her only child and heir, bequeathing her entire fortune to a kind young woman named Evangeline Brown.

"That…that….scullery maid is not getting a DIME!" Vicki snarled once the younger woman left. "Thank God she didn't hear that bitch mention the will. Tell me you found it!"

"I'm lookin!"

"Look harder, damn you, even if you have to tear apart every inch of this godforsaken house!"

 **Page~*~*~*~Break**

Belle and Miri decided to spend the next day at the pawnshop. Belle knew her husband would be extremely busy over the holidays and was more than happy to give him a hand.

"Darling, you should invest in another register," she advised him.

"Yes, I've been thinking about it," he replied. Business had improved since they had all become children again and then were changed back. "But then I would need to hire someone to be a cashier. Someone I trusted."

And there was the fact that he trusted precious few individuals except his family.

"Henry would have to be sixteen to work here, wouldn't he?"

Gold nodded. "Yes. That's a law. And he can work no more than four hours a day, three days a week."

"Then maybe I can if you teach me how. It can't be that hard. What do you think, sweetie? Should Mama help Papa out a little bit?" she asked their daughter, tickling her belly.

Miri giggled explosively, her laughter tinkling in the air and bringing joy to any who heard it, even in passing.

"It's not that hard. I'm sure it'll only take you an hour to learn," her husband replied. "But it's only temporary till I find someone else. Otherwise we'll need to find a nanny to watch the little dearie."

"All right."

The bell tinkled above the door and Cedric Brown entered, a blue cloth bag in his hands. "Good Afternoon, Mr. Gold, Mrs. Gold," he greeted with a faint smile.

"Mr. Brown," Gold nodded at him cordially and returned the smile. "What can I do for you?"

He set the bag down on the table and opened it. Inside was a pearl choker and earrings, the first gifts Cedric had given to the first Mrs. Brown when they were betrothed. "I would like to sell these," he said sadly.

Rumple pulled out his jeweler's loup, though he knew without checking they were genuine, and not manufactured pearls. He fingered the choker and said quietly, "You know these are rare Australian deep sea pearls. Are you certain you wish to part with them, Mr. Brown?"

He already knew what the answer would be, but he had to ask anyway, on principle. This way no one could accuse him of being a shark just eager to fence what was brought to him.

"Yes...What will you offer me?"

"Let me get my price guide," Gold murmured, and turned to the shelf just behind the register where he kept all the current antique and other price guides.

"Mr. Brown, is something wrong?" Belle asked worriedly.

"No, no...I was just...I no longer need these and..."

Rumple laid down the guide on the counter, prepared to page through it, and asked very softly, "You wouldn't be selling these because you need an extension on your rent, now would you? Because if you do, all I need is one earring as a promissory note. . . "

He could read the desperation on the other's face, and knew exactly what the other man was feeling, having been there himself. But he feared the other might be too proud to accept what he considered "charity".

"Umm...no, no I do not need an extension," Cedric said bravely.

Gold eyed him shrewdly. Then he sighed. "Very well." He knew better than to press. A man who came to him this way had very little pride left, he was not about to shred it further, despite the fact that he could have given Brown half what these were worth from the petty cash in his pocket. He consulted the book, then rounded up the number by an extra two hundred dollars.

"I can give you two thousand dollars," he told his customer.

"What...oh thank you Mr. Gold!" Cedric cried.

The other man held back his tears. The amount would be enough to cover the rent, groceries and a few gifts for the children. It was more than he could have hoped for.

"You're welcome, dearie. I can also extend the collateral on these to a year, which would give you time to buy them back if you want," the pawnbroker said generously. "They look like something you might want someday for your daughter."

As if in agreement, Miri squealed behind the counter, prompting her papa to pick her up. "It would seem this bitty lady agrees, don't you, _alanna_?" he crooned, kissing her delicate cheek. The word meant "darling" in Gaelic, a language he had worked hard to become proficient in.

"One of them...Aggie has her mother's pacifier...Lily or Chrissy would want them," Cedric murmured.

"I'll keep them safe then," Rumple said, and rang up the sale one handed, while his own baby girl played with his tie and drooled on his suit.

Cedric couldn't help laughing recalling the many times his seven children had done the same to him. "Nothing we wear is safe from that, is it?"

Rumple gave a rueful grin. "No . . .but that's one of the joys of fatherhood." He went to hand Cedric the bills and Miri tried to grab them. "Ah, ah. No money for you yet, imp!" he scolded playfully and laughed at the scowl that suddenly wrinkled her tiny features. "And none of your temper either, dearie."

"How is Mrs. Brown, I haven't seen her at the library?"

"Oh she's been a bit busy Mrs. Gold...caring for Mrs. Parker. She passed away I'm afraid."

"I'm sorry to hear that," Gold said sincerely, and gave Miri his tie to amuse herself with.

"I should be getting home. Thank you again, Mr. Gold and I'll be certain to have Evangeline stop by the library soon Mrs. Gold. Good day."

"Have a Merry Christmas," Rumple called, hoping that the money would help the poor man and his family do just that.

Then he turned to where his daughter had stuffed most of his hundred dollar Ferragamo into her mouth and said in a singsong voice, "Oh me, oh my! Looks like someone's hungry!" Then he blew a raspberry on her tummy. "Mmmm . . . and I could eat you all up!"

"Rumple, I'm worried about the Browns," Belle confessed.

Her husband looked up from playing with his daughter, a shrewd glint in his eye. "So you noticed too," he remarked. Then again, it was not surprising because his wife was a very intuitive and smart lady.

"I know they're afraid to ask for help but..."

"Perhaps we could send them an anonymous gift basket?" he suggested.

"Rumple, that's perfect...and gifts for the children!"

"Yes, now we need to find out their ages and sizes and so on." The brown eyes twinkled.

"I'll have to leave that up to you...you're better at it than I am."

"I can ask Henry. He probably goes to school with some of them," Rumple acknowledged.

Belle nodded in agreement. "Or if Evangeline happens to drop by the library I could ask her."

"Yes that would be good. Now let's put these pearls in the case." He handed her the key and a velvet jewelry stand for display.

"Now I put the earrings on each side?"

"Yes, like that, dearie. We want them to be seen," Rumple instructed patiently, as his little dearie began chewing on his tie clip.

"Afterwards...we should do something about their rent."

"I can put them on a hardship pay scale where they get a reduced rate," he answered. "Along with that comes six months of free utilities."

Belle smiled.

Her smile made Rumple feel suffused with contentment and peace. He found that doing things to help out the less fortunate, like he had been once upon a time, made him feel accomplished and fulfilled.

He glanced at his watch. "Shall we take a break for lunch? It's twelve thirty."

"Yes, please!"

He gestured and the sign flipped on the door to CLOSED. And then the door locked. "Okay. Shall we do takeout or have lunch at Granny's?"

"Either way you are getting me a hamburger!"

"Naturally," he chuckled. "And I want a cheeseburger with pickles, crispy onions, lettuce, and extra ketchup. And curly fries."

"Just don't order those fries ON the burger the way I see kids do..." Belle made a face.

Rumple wrinkled his nose. "On it? What kind of crazy idiocy is that?"

"I don't know but it seems to be all the rage now and unhealthy."

"Yes. Although Granny does grill her burgers and I ask her to put ours on whole wheat sesame buns." Gold replied. The burgers were also 85% lean ones, so not as bad as the fast food kind-which he wasn't even sure was real beef.

"After lunch we can go shopping for the gift basket." Belle had some ideas in her mind of what she wanted to include and wanted to make certain she could get them before anyone else did.

"Good idea. Now shall we eat here or do you want to eat there?"

She smiled. "It's been a while since we had a shop picnic."

"Then let me call for delivery," he said, grinning. "This way we can put a blanket on the floor and let Miri lie on it. She's trying to crawl now."

"Oh I cannot wait until she starts to walk...and talk!"

Rumple smiled. "I can remember when Bae started walking. He just stopped crawling one day, sat up and . . .walked to me at my wheel. I nearly fell off it, I was so shocked. My thread was a tangled mess that day but who cared? Milah missed it because she was sleeping off one of her all nighters." He grimaced.

"Why am I not surprised?" Belle scowled. "We are going to experience every special moment in Miri's life together."

"Which is how it should be," he said sincerely. "What do you think will be her first word?"

"Papa or dearie!" Belle giggled. "Shall we wager on it?"

"All right. How much do you wanna bet?" he challenged with a roguish smirk.

"I wasn't thinking of money..."

He lofted an eyebrow. "What other stakes did you have in mind, Belle?"

"Well..." She stroked his hair gently. "I was thinking more along the lines of an enchanted evening..."

And she knew her husband would deliver.

"Ahh . . .with candles and dark chocolate strawberries and champagne?" he teased. "Just the two of us . . .with you in that gold nightie with chipped cups I made for you?" He smiled provocatively.

"With a few layers of course...if I can manage it."

"Well, it did come with a small gold lame robe," he reminded. "And I suppose I can wear my . . .well that's up to you."

She held out her hand." We have a deal Mr. Gold."

He clasped it. "And if you win . . . YOU have a date, Mrs. Gold. With a certain sexy thing!" he winked at her and twitched his hips playfully.

"You can show me those moves tonight."

He bowed over her hand. "As you wish."

Then he pulled out his cell and dialed the number to the diner.

Belle went to the backroom and looked through the cabinet until she found the blanket she wanted. It was one Rumple wove himself with roses and spinning wheels that he kept at the shop in case it was cold or he wanted to take a nap when business was slow.

While his wife got the blanket, Rumple heated up Miri's cereal with peaches in the baby food warmer on the counter, though instead of electricity he used his magic to warm the food. The baby was now eating rice cereal with formula and stirred in fruit as well as taking a bottle.

As Belle was coming out of the backroom she gasped in shock. "Rumple. Look! Look!"

He turned around, the spoon with the peaches in his hand. "What? What's happened?"

Belle pointed to the floor where their small daughter was crawling behind the counter to reach her father. "You're almost there, sweetie! Go to Papa!" she cried.

Rumple gasped with awe and pride. He knelt and called, "C'mere, _alanna_! Come to Papa!"

He had left her on her small quilt while he went to warm up the food. Apparently, she had grown too impatient to wait. He watched as she slowly pulled herself along, gazing at him determinedly.

He held out his arms, smiling, while tears blurred his eyes. "Belle! Our baby's crawling!"

"I know," she sobbed joyfully. "I know...go to Papa baby..."

Miri paused, her huge eyes wide, and rocked back and forth, as if trying to decide how to proceed. She babbled to her parents, excited and yet a bit scared. It was a LONG way to go to where Rumple was kneeling. She wavered, uncertain.

"Go to Papa," Belle encouraged.

Rumple patted the floor. "Come on, baby girl! You can do it. Come to me, Miri!" he tried to make his voice as encouraging as possible.

He waved the spoon at her. "Look! Peaches! Mmm! Yummy!" he pretended to eat what was on the spoon.

Miri saw and squawked indignantly. Mine! she seemed to be saying. Then she put a hand in front of her and started to crawl again.

"Better hurry, sweetie, before Papa eats it all," Belle giggled.

Miri burbled and continued crawling . . . until she touched Rumple's knee.

"You did it! Yay!" Rumple crowed and clapped while his daughter grabbed his leg to try and sit up. "That's my big girl!"

Belle sat on the floor beside her husband and wiped tears from her eyes, seeing so much of her beloved husband in their precious baby girl who was growing up so quickly.

Giggling, Rumple popped the spoon with the peaches into his baby's open mouth. "Mmm! Good, isn't it? I always loved peaches."

Miri smiled . . . then blew a raspberry at him. Pureed peaches landed all over his Armani.

"Hey! Little imp!" he cried, then he burst into giggles. "Oh dearie dearie dear!" He sighed. "Just because I love peaches doesn't mean I want to wear them!"

"You asked for it!"

Belle was enjoying seeing their daughter behaving just they did when they were children again. "Now I remember you being silly like that when we were kids."

"Me? How about you? You put a meatball down my pants!" he accused, cleaning himself off with a baby wipe.

Just then the shop door was knocked on. "Umm . . .Belle could you get the door? I think lunch is here."

"Helloooooooo!" they heard Ruby call out.

"Just a minute!" Rumple replied, standing up and holding his daughter in one arm while still trying to wipe off peaches from his tie.

Belle opened the door before her husband had a chance to. "Oh Ruby, you missed it! Miri is crawling!" she said breathlessly.

Ruby beamed. "Oh that's wonderful, Belle!" She carried the lunch order in two brown paper bags in her hand. As she came in, she caught sight of Rumple holding Miri. "Well, hello, sweetie!" she cooed to Miri. Then she took a second look at Rumple and burst out laughing. "Lord love a duck, what happened to YOU? You get in a fight with a blender, Rumple?"

"More like Miri!" Belle laughed.

"She learned to crawl and blow raspberries all in one day," Rumple coughed, torn between pride and chagrin.

Then he walked around the counter and set Miri on the floor. "Show Ruby what you can do, little dearie! Go on! Crawl to Mama!"

"Come on, sweetie. You can do it!" Belle encouraged, kneeling down and holding out her arms.

Miri grinned and began to rock back and forth.

She glanced back questioningly at her father, who made shooing motions.

"Go on, Miri! Mama's waiting!" he urged.

Thus encouraged, the baby began to crawl to Belle, going faster now that she knew how to cross the floor.

"That's it...just a little more...come on!"

Ruby held out her phone, capturing the precious moment on video.

Miri's little hand touched Belle's Prada shoe and she beamed up at her mama.

Belle picked her up and held her tightly, covering her small face with kisses.

"Mmma!" Miri laughed and blew kisses back.

"Oh Rumple! I think she said Mama!"

"I don't know, dearie. She seems like she was trying to kiss you," he said, not wanting Belle to lose her deal with him.

He blew a kiss to his daughter, who waved and returned the favor.

"Maybe she's not quite ready to talk yet," Belle murmured.

"Give her time, Belle," Ruby advised. "After all, Rome wasn't built in a day."

"I have a nice little bet to win," she whispered.

"A bet? With who?" Ruby queried, snickering. "Mr. Small, Sexy, Spinner?" She jerked her head back at Rumple.

"Yes. If Miri says Papa or dearie as her first word...I get an enchanted evening with Mr. Sexy Spinner."

"Ooo la la!" sang her friend. "Better go and get your hair and nails done, honey!"

"I just have to wait for my daughter to give me the opportunity."

"I'll watch her for you," offered Ruby generously. "You know I love kids. Especially my little Miranda doll here." She kissed Miri's cheek. "Right, pretty girl?"

Miri blew a raspberry at her and giggled.

"Oh you're daddy's little imp, ain'tcha?" the werewolf snickered. Then she blew one back at the baby.

Ruby played back the video of Miri crawling. "I'll send it to you so you can download it."

"Thank you, dearie. We were both so enthralled we forgot to take pictures," Gold admitted. "Now, how much do I owe you?"

She looked at the slip. "Twenty-one fifteen."

Gold paid her . . .plus a ten dollar tip. "Here. Go get your nails done." He teased.

"The brightest red I can find!" she laughed.

He gave her a wolf whistle in return.

Miri, attempting to mimic him, blew a raspberry instead.

Belle was in stitches. "The two of you are too much!"

Rumple winked at her outrageously. "I'm hungry, so let's eat!"

 **Page~*~*~*~Break**

The kids decided to drop their surprise package off at Sapphira's the next morning before their parents took them to preschool. The parents had gotten together and decided that one of them would pick all of the children up and take them, each parent taking a turn during the week. That day it was Peri's turn to pick everyone up. Killian stuffed the surprise package into his backpack before he met up with his mother in the kitchen.

"I did something different for lunch this time. Now don't be worrying...you can have your meatball sandwich on Friday."

"Yeah cause I havta have my meatballs!"

Emma chuckled and ruffled his hair. "I know you do. How do homemade hot pockets sound?"

"Awesome! Didja make pizza ones?!"

"Yes and I made sure I made a veggie snack for Annie, the one you call Professor."

"Uh-huh cause she's not 'llowed to have anything with wheat in it."

"Be a good boy at school," Bae said.

Killian rolled his eyes. "Dad, m'always good at school 'less those jerks start somethin." He was referring to another group of children who seemed to enjoy harassing Killian and his friends, even going as far as locking them out during recess and Killian had a terrifying encounter with a group of wolves while trailing Sapphira. (A Little Preschool Mishap). Since then Jasmine and Ashley kept a close eye on them to make certain they behaved themselves.

They heard a knock on the door. Killian raced over to open it. "Hey Archie! You here to pick Dad up?"

"Yes. We're going to a conference today. He may be a little late coming home, Emma."

"That's okay, Archie. What's it about?"

"We're going to be talking about bullying and things we can do to help. It's getting out of hand in the schools and online." Archie frowned. Emma nodded in agreement.

"You and Bae might want to talk to the teachers and parents...just a suggestion, Archie."

"We're going to, hon. Maybe the other doctors at this conference can give us ideas."

"Mom, Peri's here!" Killian called out.

"Holy crap, kid! Tone it down a bit. You're not on the ship!" Emma laughed while she walked him out to the van. "Have a good day at school and thanks, Peri!"

"No problem, honey!"

Peri had been at her shop most of the morning arguing with a supplier over a late order while her husband was at home getting Bobby and Annie ready for school. Peri decided to pick the other children up first then drive back to their house to collect her children since the school was closer to where they lived.

Bobby and Annie were waiting in the backyard for their friends.

"Ya got it?" Bobby asked Killian. He nodded.

"Uh-huh. You wanna be lookout while I do it?"

"Hurry up!" Yasmina urged.

Bobby boosted his friend up over the wooden fence that divided Melanie's yard and theirs. The kitchen light was turned off and the door locked. Killian set the surprise package down on the swing and ran back to the fence and climbed back over.

"Okay kids, time to go!" Peri called out.

"We're comin', Mom!"

All afternoon the Nevengers couldn't help picturing the look on their rival's face when she opened her surprise package to find nothing in it thinking it was exactly what she deserved for being so nasty to them and others.

Ruby was more than happy to take care of Miri while her parents did some shopping that afternoon. Neither would say what it was about but she had her suspicions having seen Mr. Gold sneaking out at night over the holidays leaving anonymous gift baskets to those in need. To some people he would always be the Dark One but others were learning there was so much more to him than met the eye especially when they saw him as a child again.

The baskets contained mostly fruits but there were also envelopes inside that contained gift cards to stores where the recipients could purchase food and clothing for themselves and their families, the gift card amounts in the thousands. The Golds spared no expense for the needy of Storybrooke and some of their friends took part in the custom too by sending their own care packages. Peri and Nick also sent care packages overseas since several of Nick's friends were serving in the Middle East.

While they were walking out of the mall they met up with Archie and Selene, Archie's arms loaded with bags while two employees from Babies R Us were carrying boxes. Rumple giggled.

"What did you do, dearies? Buy out the whole store?" he teased.

"Well…ahhh….we wanted to make sure we had everything…" Archie mumbled.

"If you didn't before, you do now."

"Rumple, we left our baskets at the shop," Selene spoke up.

"Good. We'll be sending them out tonight."

"Do you need any help with it?"

"No, Bae and Henry are going to help. You need to be at home with Selene, Archie."

"Rumple, I'm not due until February," Selene laughed.

"I'm not taking any chances honey," Archie said softly. "Thank you Rumple."

Both couples were unaware that Selma Quickly and her companion were listening to their entire conversation….and planning. They knew the Golds often put gift cards in their care baskets and once in while a big check would be included, a check that would allow them to live in the lap of luxury for a while. They didn't need any of the baby junk the Hoppers were buying but they knew the therapist spent lavishly on his limey wife and in-laws. They staked out the wealthiest houses in Storybrooke and discovered that many of them were hiding their Christmas gifts in their vehicles until it was time to wrap them. Fortunately they knew how to pick trunk locks and disable vehicle alarms. They waited until after midnight before they made their move and since it was not small job, they had to bring in a few friends who were more than happy to remind them that they had to hand over a portion of what they took.

Their first stop was the pawn shop. It was risky, there was no doubt in any of their minds that old man Gold had the place wired…and probably warded.

"You go first," Selma said, shoving one of their cohorts toward the door.

"Get outta here! He's probably got one of those pendulum things that's gonna cut my head off soon as I open the goddam door!"

Selma snorted. "Gold's gone soft because of that librarian he's married to…now get over there!"

The man gulped and took his lock picks out of his bag. The moment he inserted them into the doorknob, an electric charge surged through his body. The others watched with amusement while he wriggled like a worm on a hook. The device was not set to kill or even cause serious physical injury but Rumple knew how to teach thieves a lesson without having to resort to murder. He fell to the ground a few minutes later, his clothes and hair smoking.

"Now what? I'm not getting my ass fried!"

"Why don'cha break the window?"

Three pairs of eyes glared daggers at the speaker.

"Oh yeah….and why don't we go down to the sheriff's office and say 'Hey we're tryin' to break in Gold's shop. You wanna give us a hand?' Your name should be Dumbass instead of Duane!"

Selma rolled her eyes. "Will you idiots stop shooting your mouths off and figure out a way in this damned place!"

"Is there a back door?" one asked.

"Yeah but betcha it's got that 'lectric thing on it too!"

"Maybe we oughta try a window?"

"I don't care if you crawl in through a damn kitty door, just get in there!" Selma snarled.

"Who knows how to deal with magic wards?" grumbled another. "Not me. I stayed away from wizards back in the old country."

Frustrated, Selma grabbed the tool bag and threw it at the shop's front window.

The bag bounced off the glass and dropped to the ground. "Guess that's out!"

"We need something that cancels out magic . . . but what?"

"A stick of dynamite?"

Selma was at her wit's end and cursing Cedric Brown and his brats for putting her in this predicament.

"Nah. Then the whole town will come running."

"And we don't exactly have a magic cancelling five and dime around here, do we?" Selma demanded of her cohorts?"

"What about we use someone as a Trojan Horse?"

Selma was beginning to like that idea. "Okay, how? Gold isn't stupid."

"There's always some desperate kid or someone who needs help this time of year. We can make sure they don't talk by threatening to kill them or their family . . . and they can case the place for us and maybe Gold will take pity on them and dismantle the wards for 'em."

Selma grinned. She knew just the desperate people.

"Then they get the loot and give it to us and we let them take the fall if necessary."

"Looks like I may be able to get even with that idiot Cedric after all."

She heard through the grapevine that both he and Evangeline lost their jobs and both were too proud to ask Lady Stitch for help. But...if their little brats were threatened, they would be more agreeable to the group's plans.

"Why don't we go back to the hideout and discuss things?" suggested one, shivering in the cold Maine air.

"Fine by me but the sooner we move on this, the better,' Selma muttered. The crew got in their van and drove off.


	2. Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap

**Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap**

Selma Quickly learned from her disastrous courtship with Cedric Brown the man would do anything for his seven spoiled little brats, including marry so that Lady Stitch would continue to support them and humiliate her in front of dozens of guests simply because _they_ didn't like her. She would have enjoyed sending the lot off to boarding school once _she_ was mistress of the house. Now he was married to that milksop Evangeline and she'd been tossed out her behind, forced to petty thievery once Mr. Quickly's money ran out. It hadn't taken long since Selma was a woman with expensive tastes. Now the children that had ruined her life would be her ticket back to high society. After discussing their plan, the crew drove to the Brown house ready to put it into action.

Evangeline awoke and shuffled down the hall to the bathroom. She felt strong arms seize her from behind and clap a hand over her mouth. "Don't make a sound or you'll be popping your brat through a hole in your belly!"

Terrified for herself and her unborn child she complied. Her captor dragged her back down the hall to the bedroom where two other men were restraining Cedric with duct tape.

"Now you're gonna do a little job for us or you'll never see your little scullery maid or brats again. Understand?" one of them demanded of Cedric. He nodded.

In the childrens' room Selma stood by the doorway with a gun in her hands. "All of you…march yourselves outside…now…and no tricks or I WILL shoot you!"

Simon, the trickster of the family was angry but didn't dare risk anything, not at gunpoint. He picked up Aggie and carried her downstairs, his siblings close at his heels, all of them frightened. They were forced into the back of a van with their stepmother.

"What're they gonna do with us?" Christiana asked fearfully.

"I don't know sweetie, I don't know…" Evangeline murmured, wrapping her arms around the child protectively.

Cedric listened with a heavy heart while Selma's colleagues explained what they wanted him to do, warning him that if he went to the police or slipped up in any way, he would never see his precious wife and children alive again. It was a dangerous plan. Mr. Gold was the most powerful man in Storybrooke and not one to be trifled with but he was a desperate man and if anyone knew what lengths a desperate man would go to protect the ones he loved, it was Mr. Gold. Perhaps if he told the sorcerer what was going on, he would be able to help him….

Though they all made a vow that their Disney adventures would be their last as toddlers, Rumple, Belle and Regina all confessed a desire to become children again at least one more time but they wanted to wait until Miri was a bit older and could understand. While Belle and Regina entertained Miri out front, Rumple was in the backroom preparing one more bottle of the youth potion that he would store in his wall safe along with some of his other magical items he wanted to keep from falling into the wrong hands, particularly those of Sapphira.

He made sure the safe's locks were reprogrammed with different codes each month, and the safe itself was not able to be opened by just anyone, especially not someone who merely had some of his blood on something. They had to get permission from him to open the safe-and only permission from him along with his touch on the lock would cause the safe to open. Said permission had to be given freely, without coercion of any kind-so no torture, no holding any of his family hostage. If someone did manage to make him open the safe, the contents within would be different from the actual ones-no truly dangerous magical items but a lot of money and some jewels which looked real . . .but their value would fade a few days later, and the thief be left with nothing of true value. As well as being a magnet for police to arrest. Because no one stole from Mr. Gold and got away with it.

"Rumple, I think we found another apple fan!" Regina called out from the front.

Miri sat on her lap munching on apple pieces the former queen fed her from the apples she'd just picked from her tree in the garden.

"Remind me Auntie Regina has to make you some applesauce next time I come to see you. Would you like that?"

Miri nodded. "Mmm!" she said happily.

"I think I'd love some of that myself Regina, with cinnamon," Belle said.

Regina laughed. "You Golds and your cinnamon! I'll have plenty in it."

"Cinnamon is very good for you," Rumple said, coming out with the potion in his hand. "It tastes good also."

"Did you make an antidote too, Rumple?"

"Of course. I wouldn't be without one . . . especially after what happened last time." He set the bottle on the counter.

Miri held out her arms.

"Do you want to come to Papa, dearie?" he asked his daughter, his eyes twinkling.

"Mmmm hmmm!"

"Put her down, Gina. Let her crawl to me," he urged and then he moved out from behind the counter. "Miri, come to Papa!"

"Okay sweetie. You heard Papa. Go on," Belle urged once Regina set the baby down on the floor.

The baby began crawling across the floor determinedly.

Then a shaft of sunlight illuminated the glass case, and also the crystal bottle atop the counter. Mesmerized by all the colorful prisms of light, Miri stopped and then tried to follow the rainbows up the side of the glass.

She babbled and kneeled putting her hands all over the case and squealing and banging excitedly.

"Miri, no be careful!" Belle cried out.

"Dearie, not the glass!" Rumple groaned and moved to pick up the baby.

Miri's little tremors caused the glass bottle with the potion to teeter on the edge of the counter.

Rumple had just picked up his little imp when the bottle slipped off the edge of the case and shattered on the floor, splattering himself, Regina, and Belle with the youth potion.

"Awww no...we weren't sposta turn inta kids now!" little Regina whined.

Miri stared at the toddler Rumple, her eyes wide and then her face crinkled into an O of surprise. She poked his cheek with her hand.

"Hey, watch the finger!" small Rumple said, then sat down on the floor. "Gotta sit down!" he panted. "You're heavy, dearie!"

"We gotta find an adult an' fast!" Belle cried.

"Call Bae!" Rumple said. "My phone's on my desk in my back room."

Miri was now pulling at his hair. "Oww! No, Miri! Don't pull Papa's hair!" he scolded.

His daughter smirked at him, not recognizing the small boy as her father.

Just then the bell tinkled over the front door of the shop. "Rumple, are you...oh my God! Why are you children again?" Archie stared at the four toddlers, his eyes wide with shock.

"Archie, we had an accident," the former pawnbroker groaned. "Miri, don't! That's my eye!" He wondered if this was what a small dog felt like getting mauled to death by an over inquisitive toddler.

"I'll say." He picked up Miri. "Okay...everybody out to the car and I'll go find Bae and Emma."

They headed out to Archie's car, only to realize they needed help opening the door.

"And we need Miri's car seat and diaper bag!" Belle called.

"Okay, okay...hold on..."

 _Hopper, this is practice for when your baby arrives. Better get used to it_. Archie ran back into the shop with the kids at his heels. "Belle, can you grab the diaper bag?" He balanced Miri in one arm and struggled to hold the car seat in the other. "Damn...how did you two manage this? These car seats are heavy!"

Belle grabbed the diaper bag and dragged it out to the car. "We put the car seat in before we got the baby," she told him.

"Now she tells me!"

Regina looked at Rumple. "So . . . where's the antidote, Mr. Wizard?"

Rumple squirmed. "Umm . . . it's still being made," he admitted. "I was gonna finish it later," he coughed sheepishly.

"Oh real neat Dumbo!"

The attorney scowled. "Who knew my kid was gonna knock the potion all over us? So sue me!"

"Ah kiss my hairy butt!"

"Do you two want a time out? No fighting!" Archie said sternly.

"She started it," Rumple grumbled. Archie opened the back seat of the car and he crawled inside, helping to buckle the car seat securely.

Miri reached out from her car seat and tugged on his hair.

"Oww! That hurts! Stop it!" he yelled, and shook his finger in her face.

"Aww good job! You made her cry!" Belle snapped.

"Meanie!" Regina stuck her tongue out at him.

"She pulled out half my hair!" Rumple sniffled, rubbing his head.

Miri's howls nearly deafened them. Desperate, he rummaged in the diaper bag and found a small container of Goldfish. "Miri, Look! Fishies!" They were small cinnamon graham cracker ones and the baby loved them.

"I want some too!" Regina shrilled.

Archie groaned, feeling a headache coming on.

"What're we gonna do when she wants Mama an' Papa?" Belle asked worriedly.

"Get hearin' aids cause she's gonna scream us all deaf," Regina answered.

Rumple gave Goldfish to everyone. "I dunno, dearie. I guess we'll have to wait till Emma finishes the potion so we can be turned back."

"Why can't you just use your magic and change us back?" asked Belle.

"Umm . . . because a potion turned us little, we need the antidote to turn us back," sighed the small sorcerer. "It's one of the Laws of Magic. Like into like."

"The magic laws suck sometimes. We there yet?" Belle demanded of Archie.

"No, no we're not there yet."

Rumple began playing with Miri. "Fishy fishy in the sea!" he singsonged while moving the Goldfish in the air like a fish swimming. "Fishy fisy swim to me! Open up!" he made the Goldfish "swim" towards Miri's mouth.

The baby knew this game and eagerly opened her mouth and he popped the graham cracker in it. "Mmm!"

"My turn!" he said and repeated the rhyme and then fed himself.

Regina reached into the bag and took out a large handful of Goldfish.

"Hey! You gonna share some of that?"

"Get your own, bookworm!"

"Sharing is caring," Rumple recited, then gave the bag to Belle. "Here, Belle."

Miri saw and began to whimper holding her hands out for more.

"Wait a minute, Miri." her toddler papa instructed. "You gotta wait your turn."

Not understanding, Miri began to cry.

"Aww are we there yet! Takin for-ever!" Regina complained.

"Regina Hood, if I have to pull this car over you are getting a time out!" Archie warned.

"Shhh!" Rumple said, and offered Miri a Goldfish.

But the baby pushed his hand away, now not wanting it and wanting a bottle instead. "Baa-baa!" she bawled.

"Rumple, she's thirsty," Belle said helpfully.

"Umm . . . do we have any milk?" he asked, and looked in the diaper bag. "Aww hells bells!" he groaned. "We left the bottles in the fridgerator!"

"Yeah and ya can't be giving her booby milk neither. Jeez Louise! Is that a baby or foghorn!" Regina groaned, holding her ears. "Gonna conjure up some earmuffs!"

Then she did so, ones with fuzzy zebra stripes. She put them on and sighed in relief.

Miri still continued howling.

"Rumple, do something!" Belle snapped.

"Whaddya want me to do? Become a cow?" he groused.

Archie changed direction and pulled into the parking lot of the grocery store. "I hope they sell bottles in here. What kind of milk do I need to get?"

"She drinks goat's milk." Belle said.

"What? Where am I supposed to get that?"

"It's in the dairy section," answered the librarian. "I can show ya."

"Okay, okay, everybody out..."

They all scrambled out of the car. "I'll get a cart!" Rumple yelled, forgetting he was little and starting to go across the parking lot to where the carts were stacked.

"Rumple, slow down!"

"C'mon, slowpokes!" he called.

Archie caught up with the toddler attorney and gave him a Disapproving Look. "What are you supposed to do when you're a child?"

"Oh!" Rumple hung his head. "Hold a grown-up's hand." He slipped his hand into Archie's. "And look both ways for I cross the road."

"That's right."

"Why don't we get one a those car carts so's we all can ride?" Belle suggested.

"Yeah let's!" Regina agreed.

"Ple-ease!" Rumple begged, giving the therapist puppydog eyes from behind his floofy bangs.

"Oh all right. Pick one."

"I want the one with the blue flowers," Belle pointed to one.

"I want the one with the fire!" Regina said.

"I don't care what one we get," Rumple said.

An older boy was walking past with his mom, pushing a cart and he cried, "Whoa, Mom! Lookit that dude! He's got triplets n' a baby!"

"Doctor Hopper? Are you and Selena fostering?" she asked him.

"Hurry up, pick one, we ain't got all day!" Rumple told them. "B'fore Miri screams herself blue."

"I'm gettin the fire one!" Regina announced.

"Fine but next time we get the blue flower one," Belle said. "Put the quarter in, Archie!"

"Do ya got a quarter?" Rumple asked. "If not, I do."

Archie took a quarter out of his pocket and inserted it.

The kids all piled into the cart, and Archie put Miri in the infant seat provided.

"Okay Belle, let's go to the dairy section first so you can show me where the goat's milk is. Why does she drink that when most kids in this land drink regular milk or formula?"

"Cause she's lactose intolerant and the soy milk makes her throw up," Belle replied.

"That's what I drank when I was a baby," Rumple put in. "S'what my papa had for milk."

"Should I give my baby goat's milk?"

"Only if he or she can't drink the formula," Belle answered. "You'll know if you need to."

He picked up a bottle and put it in the cart.

Miri grabbed a rattle from a shelf.

"No, Miri! You don't steal," Rumple reprimanded, trying to get the rattle from her.

Miri promptly whacked him in the head with it and giggled.

Rumple winced. "What is this? Punching Bag Papa Day?" He rubbed his forehead.

Regina swiped a pack of Oreos and tossed it into the car.

Belle saw some fruit snacks and put them next to it.

Rumple saw some peanut butter and chocolate Pop Tarts and put them next to the fruit snacks.

While Archie was getting a bottle of goat's milk in the dairy isle, Regina jumped out of the cart and ran down to the ice cream freezer and grabbed several half gallons.

"Didja get Cherry Garcia?" asked Rumple anxiously.

"Yep! An Rocky Road," she said gleefully.

Rumple clapped his hands.

"Belle you go get us some Klondikes while he's 'stracted," Regina instructed.

"Okay," Belle ran over to the Klondike section and got two kinds, Chocolate Fudge and Snickers.

"Oooh cool!"

There was only a small line when Archie got to the checkout counter and set the bottle and goat's milk down on the counter.

"Ahh...sir...those too." the cashier said, pointing to the children's cache in the cart.

"What is all this?" Archie demanded, frowning at the Nevengers.

"Snacks. Cause we're hungry," Rumple replied. "If you need more money, I can give you my AmEx." He went to reach into his suit pocket for his wallet.

"No, no I've got it...and could you please add a few of your reusable bags too please," he informed the cashier. "I'll use them instead of the plastic and paper bags."

"All right."

The cashier nodded and added them on to the total, wondering what the heck kind of kid had a credit card at four years old?

When Archie saw the total he wished he had used Rumple's AmEx card. He hadn't realized how expensive everything had gotten.

Once they got back to the car he filled the bottle with goat's milk and handed it to Rumple.

"Miri, dearie, here's your milk!" he said, and he gave the baby the bottle while Archie put the bags in his trunk.

When they arrived at Bae and Emma's house, Emma and Aria were outside watching Snow and David building a snowman for their granddaughter.

"Hey, Archie!" Snow waved at him. "You wanna help us finish this?"

"In a minute." He opened the back door for his small passengers.

"Hey, Gina, you wanna build a snowman?" asked Belle.

"Yeah! C'mon Rumple, move your butt!"

"Archie, come n' get the baby!" the pint-sized attorney called, then he followed the other two.

"Archie, what the heck happened? Why are they kids again?" Emma cried.

"Miri accidently spilled a youth potion on them...although I don't know why there was one around."

Rumple threw a snowball at Regina. "Ten points! Butt shot!" Then he ran around the snowman and hid behind David.

"Oh no ya don't. Gonna getcha!" Regina giggled, chasing him with a snowball in her hand.

"Missed me! Missed me!" taunted the little imp, then he ran off.

"You wait, imp." She tossed the snowball at him. "Ten points for me, ice butt!"

He brushed off his pants. Then he stuck out his tongue.

"Please tell me he has the antidote somewhere," Emma groaned.

Turning to Emma, he asked, "Where's Bae, Henry, and Killian?"

"Bae's picking Killian and Henry up at school," she replied.

"Hiya, Aria!" he greeted his granddaughter. "We brought Miri to play with you!"

Aria wriggled in her mother's arms, excited to see her new playmate.

"Watch this!" Rumple picked up some snow and with a bit of concentration, turned it into an icy snowflake.

"'Lake...'Lake!" Aria cried and pointed.

Then he attached it to a stick and cried, "I am the Winter Warlock!" and waved it around, laughing.

"Down...down!"

"You wanna play too?" asked her toddler grandpa.

"Uh huh!"

"You wanna wand?" he asked, then made her a smaller one, out of softer snow, that was pink and silver colored. "There! Now you're an Ice Princess!"

"Bae is gonna flip out when he sees this," Emma muttered.

"But it was an accident," Rumple said, concerned. "I don't want him to be mad." The chocolate brown eyes looked woeful.

"I know, hon. . . he'll grouch a bit then he'll be fine."

Rumple sighed. "I have the antidote almost finished . . . it needs a few more things. I froze the cauldron. You could finish it for me, since I'm too little now. And I'm forgetting . . .the way I used to be."

"Don't worry kiddo. I got it." Emma ruffled his hair. "Kinda missed spoiling you rotten."

Killian was going to be over the moon seeing the old Nevengers again.

"You did?" Rumple sounded happy. "But you've got your own kids now." Suddenly he looked alarmed. "Emma, who's gonna take care of Miri? I . . . I'm not big enough anymore . . ."

And soon he would forget entirely that he had ever been anything but a child, for that was how a regression potion worked.

"We will. Don't you worry. If I can handle your granddaughter, I can handle my sister in law," Emma said confidently.

Rumple knew that Emma had watched Miri before and so would know about her dietary restrictions. But he added, "She's eating some new foods. She loves applesauce. Regina was gonna make her some with cinnamon."

"I think Mom and I can whip some up for her."

"YAY! They're back!"

Killian raced toward his grandfather the moment his father took him out of the car while Bae stood in the driveway stunned by what he was seeing...his parents and Regina young again!

"Papa? What happened?"

"An accident." Rumple said, looking ashamed. "Miri knocked my youth potion down and it splashed us."

"Luckily I was coming to see Rumple and I found them," Archie added.

Killian hugged his old friend. "Now ALL my team is back an' we can have 'ventures."

"Hey we gonna get hugs or are we chopped liver?" Regina demanded.

Rumple hugged his grandson, then said, "Better go hug Gina n' Belle so's they don't feel left out. You know how girls get."

"Yeah." Killian hugged Regina next then Belle. "Meet me at the clubhouse. Gotta tell ya a secret."

"Okay. Bae, we're gonna play now," Rumple informed his son. "Umm . . . can you watch Miri?"

"Yeah. Come on, baby girl. You can play with Aria."

"Thanks!" Rumple waved. "C'mon, Killian! Race ya!"

He began to run as quickly as he could with his cane, "skating" on top of the snow using his magic. "Whee!" he cried as he glided quickly across the snow, his hair flying out behind him.

"Hey, I wanna do that," David exclaimed. "That looks really cool!"

Snow laughed. "You know, it does." She grinned. "Maybe we could ask Rumple to enchant our shoes or something."

She had to admit that as much as she liked Rumple as an adult, she enjoyed seeing him as a child even more. There was an innocence and a carefree joy about the small sorcerer now that only emerged when he was a child, and only when he felt safe and happy in his surroundings and with people he trusted.

Bae smiled as he watched his papa, thinking that while he loved being able to ask his father's advice and speak to him man to man, he also loved seeing Rumple the child again, and being full of joy the way he had never been allowed to be the first time around.

Then he took Miri from Archie and said, "Let's go inside and have some cocoa."

As Archie followed Bae, Miri, Emma, and Aria into the house, Belle, Killian, Regina, and Henry ran after Rumple, though none of them could overtake the sorcerer before he reached the clubhouse.

Rumple pushed open the door and waited for the others. "Okay, now whatcha wanna tell me?" he asked Killian.

The former pirate grinned. "We gave the Buttmuncher a present!"

"Huh? Why'd ya do that? She's mean!" Regina made a face.

"Cause it's a big box of nothing!" Killian giggled.

"Nothing?" Rumple giggled hysterically. "Oh that's soo awesome!" He gave Killian a high five.

"An we made it all fancy an stuff so she thinks there's something in there."

"That's really clever," Belle approved. She thought maybe she shouldn't think it was funny, but the fact was that despite all Melanie's attempts, as well as her own and Rumple's, to reform the brat, Sapphira had rejected all their efforts.

Belle had been pushing Miri in her stroller getting the mail one day before the snow storm and Sapphira had hidden behind a tree close by and thrown eggs at her and the baby. One had hit the stroller and scared Miri and the other had landed on Belle's shoulder, ruining her new azure wool knit dress.

She hadn't been able to catch the wretched child, because she couldn't leave Miri to go after her, but Rumple had been livid when he had come home and heard about it.

Together they had gone to confront their neighbor, but to their dismay Sapphira had shrugged off their anger and protested that she had been having some fun.

Melanie had admitted she was at a loss on how to deal with the rebellious girl to them in private, after they had made Sapphira apologize and Melanie had spanked her and grounded her for a week.

Rumple had admitted that perhaps Sapphira might benefit from some sort of reform school if she was older. But for now she was a headache.

"I wanna see the look on her face when she gets it!" Regina grinned. "She 'serves it."

"Yeah...she threw eggs at me an Miri an scared Miri so we went over an told Melanie but she's havin' a hard time tryin' to figger out what to do with her."

"Oughta put her in a boot camp. That'd straighten her out good. Holy heck! You guys are kids again!" Annie Carlyle exclaimed when she and her brother Bobby walked into the clubhouse with the rest of the new Nevengers.

"Uh oh! Mommy Gina, does Daddy know yet?" Roland asked his now toddler stepmother.

"Umm...no. Gonna havta tell him and he's not gonna like it. Was an accident and the longer we're kids, the more we're gonna forget we were adults. Emma's gotta make the antidote to the potion."

"So you can't change back like that?" asked the Professor.

"Nope. Miri spilled youth potion on us by accident and I was makin' the antidote but didn't finish it. Emma has to," Rumple explained.

"How long's that gonna take?" Bobby demanded.

Rumple shrugged his shoulders. "She's gettin good at makin potions jus' not that good yet an ya can't hurry up with those 'cause if ya mess up ya can do somethin stupid."

Belle frowned at him. "Oh you mean like turning me into a toad and making my feather duster chase me all over the castle?"

"I told you not to come in while I was workin and you didn't listen, dearie! Not my fault you hit my potion with your feather duster."

"So why'd I turn into a toad?"

"Ummm...I was kinda mad at you for coming in and the potion reacted to my thoughts..."

"Yeah well I find it and I'm gonna make the vaccum chase you!" She smirked. "The Dirt Devil Revenge!"

"Hate that thing. We need a new one."

"Then buy me one."

"You think I'm made of money?"

"Yup."

"Gonna have to get a second job the way you spend."

Belle blew a raspberry.

"You should talk Mister I Havta Wear Ferragamo an Armani."

"I look for sales, dearie."

KIllian giggled. "Yeah we know...tell ya someone's havin a sale when you're sleepin and you wake right up."

"Yeah I know."

"Wish we had a venture to go on but business is kinda slow."

They heard a knock on the door and Killian opened it to find Robin on the other side.

"Ummm...where's Regina?"

"Right here. Sorry, honey. It was an accident...Miri spilled youth potion on us."

He sighed. "Any idea how long you'll be a kid this time?"

"Nope...an I dunno if I should stay here or at the house."

"If you stay at the house I'm gonna have to sleep on the couch or in the garage. Don't want people spreading rumors. To avoid all that you should stay here."

"Yeah. But you better come and visit or I'll kick your butt when I'm big again!"

"Okay..." He hugged her. "Behave."

Regina rolled her eyes. "Whadda ya think, we're gonna wreck the town?"

"Do you really want me to answer that?"

"Ummm...no cause I know the answer's yes."

Rumple heaved a sigh. "Ya know, dearie, half the time WE don't start anything . . .other idiots do and WE get to clean up after them. Like when Sapphira stole Marco's parents outta my shop and buried them."

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow."

"Bye guys!" Roland waved.

"That girl!" Annie snorted. "She's lucky Melanie hasn't shipped her butt off to a bad girl's school!"

"Yeah," Bobby agreed. "Where they make you eat mush and jerky, wear ugly uniforms and pick up dog doo after school and beat you with sticks."

"Ewwww!" Belle screeched.

Rumple scowled. "Sounds like that daycare she was runnin' at the convent when we were over there the first time this happened. She tried to make me, Belle, and Gina eat mush and old carrots and she woulda made us wear rags if she could've."

"She shut my nose in a book!" Belle recalled.

"Yeah and she beat my butt with a ruler," Rumple added.

"Hey guys...I think I got a venture for us!" Yasmina ran into the clubhouse out of breath.

"Really, dearie? Tell us!"

"All the Brown kids weren't at school today an' they never miss now!"

Killian frowned. "All of'em? Were they sick with somethin'? Like chicken pox or measles?"

"I dunno but it's weird. Me an' Beth tried to go by the house but Mom wouldn't drive there."

"Chrissy said Mister and Missus Brown have been doing a lot of private talk stuff and she's scared they're gonna get a divorce."

Rumple grinned. "Dearies, I think we need to do some 'vestigation. Time to get out the Justice Mobiles."

"Yeah but Mom and Dad will ground us if we sneak out."

"Knew something was wrong when Mister Brown sold that stuff!" Belle exclaimed.

"Hmm . . . yes, but I didn't wanna pry," Rumple agreed. Then he added, "Don't worry, Killian. I think I can talk your dad outta punishing us . . . after all it's not like he didn't do worse n' this when HE was a kid!"

Killian smirked and hi-fived him. "Okay Nevengers...let's get cracking!"

They went to get the Justice Mobiles . . . but the three they had weren't enough for everyone, so Rumple enlarged a gold Cadillac Matchbox car Killian had and hopped in it. "Now I'M drivin' this sweetheart!"

He turned on the stereo and it began playing. " . . .ridin' around in my automobile . . ."

"Hey scoot over! I'm riding with you!" Belle demanded.

Rumple moved over. "Okay, but no bein' a backseat driver!" He looked at the other Nevengers. "This car can hold three more people, so let's get movin'!"

"Gangster car!" Bobby joked.

"Hey it's cold out where's the heat!" Regina complained.

"Gimme a minute, dearie," Rumple said, and pressed a button. Hot air blasted out. "Better?"

"Yeah. Now you got Van Halen in this thing?" Killian asked.

"Better would be goin' to the Bahamas," said the former queen. "But I'll take what I can get."

"Maybe you n' Robin can go on vacation when you get bigger," suggested Annie, as she crawled in beside her brother. "'Kay, Rumple! We're all in here!"

Rumple hit the gas, and the car peeled off out of the yard and down the sidewalk.

"Turn there, Rumple," Annie instructed.

He obeyed, and the others followed.

Bobby giggled. It was sort of like a police procession.

Cedric Brown was attempting to keep himself busy shoveling snow, glancing around the corner nervously. He would be watched they said and he didn't doubt it.

Rumple slowed as they drove down the sidewalk. The sidewalk had been shoveled and salted-luckily the maintenance crew in Storybrooke knew better than to not do their jobs, or else he'd come and hunt them down and tear them a new one for endangering the elderly, infirm, and children.

Cedric recognized the Justice Mobiles immediately, having heard his children talk about them and their wish to join the Nevengers.

Rumple parked the car alongside the mailbox, and the others followed suit. "Cedric doesn't look too happy," he remarked to Belle.

"No. Come on, guys, let's vestigate!"

They all got out and Rumple gestured to Killian to begin the investigation.

"Hiya Mister Brown! We just wanted to see if everybody's okay...weren't at school."

"Oh...well...ahhh...they've caught colds...in this house when one gets it we all get it..."

"You oughta give 'em elderberry syrup," Rumple put in. "That'll knock the cold right outta them. You can get some at the health food store."

"Mr...Mr. Gold! What...how are you a child again?"

Rumple shrugged. "My baby had an accident with a youth potion, spilled it all over me, Belle, and Regina. It happens."

Two people concealed in the bushes smirked with satisfaction.

"But...but who is caring for Miri...and your shop..?"

"My son and daughter-in-law have everything under control. I'll be back to my old self very soon," he reassured Cedric.

"Oh...that's good. But you should get back home before they worry..."

Killian eyed him suspiciously. "You sure everything's okay cause we can help if it's not."

"Well . . . if you're sure you don't need anything . . .?" Rumple said, acting innocent, but sensing something wasn't right. Cedric looked spooked, his eyes kept darting around him.

"It's fine. Thank you."

Belle said quietly, "We'll bring over some soup n' bread for the children and Mrs. Brown later." It would give them an excuse to come back and look around.

"You don't have to do that...we'll be fine..."

"No trouble, dearie. We like to cook," Rumple assured him, then they trooped back to their cars, and as they were walking, Regina whispered to Rumple, "Hey, why's there only one car in the driveway?"

Rumple looked and only saw Cedric's station wagon. "Maybe the other one's in the garage?"

"Nope, Misses Brown said it works fine last time I saw her," Belle answered.

Regina shook her head. "Nuh uh. I saw the garage open when he was shovelin'. There was no other car there."

"Something ain't right here, mate," Killian remarked.

"Maybe we oughta do a stakeout?" Bobby suggested.

"And Mister Brown looks like he's being watched ...maybe that ole Miss Stitch hired some goons to take the kids so he'd have to live off her money again!" Yasmina mused.

"How we gonna do a stakeout without getting in trouble?" Beth asked.

"Could be, dearie. We need to discuss it more back at the clubhouse," Rumple said, and got into his gold Caddy.

"We'll figure something out," Killian replied.

The two men watching Mr. Brown stepped out from behind the bushes. "So Gold's a kid again. Now how the hell we gonna get in that shop?"

"Maybe we can kidnap him?"

"No way...those kids can still kick your ass...remember the mall thing with Santa?"

The other shuddered. "Umm . . . yeah, forgot about that . . .crap!"

"But his boy may decide he needs help running the place since he has all those kids to watch..."

"Yeah and maybe we can offer to help him out." His partner smirked diabolically.

"The boy's smart...may see through us but Brown...now they'd trust him."

"So we use Brown as a plant . . . and then go from there."

"But first...time to do some shopping around town!"

"Right!"

At the hideout, the Brown children were making their own plans to escape.

"When we all don't show up at school someone has to know something's up!" whispered Simon.

"The Nevengers can help us!" Sebastian said confidently.

They all tensed when they heard Mrs. Quickly screaming at Evangeline, the widow taking perverse pleasure in making the expectant mother a slave.

"We gotta do this ourselves," Simon mumbled.

Bae was standing outside waiting when the kids drove up in their cars.

"Uh oh," Killian sighed.

"Where have you been? We've been looking everywhere!"

He knew THAT Look his dad was wearing-it mirrored the one Rumple used to give Bae as a kid. He was just glad the other Nevengers had been dropped off before they'd come back home, since Rumple had realized it was too late for a meeting-it was getting on to supper.

"We were riding down the block, Dad," his son replied. If he were lucky, Bae wouldn't ask which block.

"Then we had to drop off the other kids," Rumple added. "That's why we're a little late."

"Papa you're not an adult now so you need to remember not to take off like that without telling us!"

"And my car got stuck in a pothole!" Regina said. "Somebody really has to fix the sidewalk over by Yasmina's house. Gonna hafta tell my road work committee."

Rumple looked guilty. "Umm . . . I forgot. I didn't mean to make you worry."

"How many times did I get that lecture?"

"Umm . . . probably about five hundred times," the small sorcerer admitted, hanging his head.

"It was my fault too," Belle said loyally. "I wanted to drive and then I got lost."

"We need to put GPS in the Justice Mobiles," Regina added. "And a Bluetooth."

"You need to remember to not leave the yard without permission, Regina Mills and Belle Gold," scolded Emma.

She came out on the porch with a dishtowel in her hand.

"You too, Killian Gold. I know you know better." She gave him her Disappointed Sheriff Interrogating a Suspect Look.

He bowed his head. "Yeah I know, Mom."

"Come on, let's go inside," Bae said. "We can discuss your behavior and consequences after dinner."

 _My God, I sound like Papa,_ he thought wryly. _And I'm sure right now I feel like he did and he feels like me!_

Rumple followed Bae into the house, feeling guilty and slightly alarmed. He hated when anyone was upset with him, it gave him a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach, reminiscent of his days with Malcolm. Even though he knew Bae would never beat him, that didn't help the visceral reaction within him.

Belle squeezed his hand comfortingly. "Rumple, it'll be okay," she whispered, knowing how he felt. She used to be the same, hating when her papa yelled at her and made her cry.

Regina tried to put on a brave face, but even she was nervous. "We weren't THAT bad, were we?" she asked Killian. "Think they're gonna send us to bed without supper n' dessert?"

He shrugged. "I dunno...maybe not."

"I hope not, cause whatever Emma cooked sure smells good!" She rubbed her growling tummy.

Aria looked up from playing with her toys on her playmat, babbling. "Hi! Hi! Hi!"

Miri was sleeping in her infant seat, looking angelic.

Rumple went to tickle his granddaughter, making her squeal.

Belle asked Emma if she needed help setting the table.

"You can put out the napkins, but Henry usually sets the table," Emma answered. "Henry!" she called her eldest. "Come set the table!"

"Okay!" he called back from his room.

"What's for dinner?" asked Regina hopefully. "We are 'llowed to eat right?"

"Of course," Emma said, shocked. "This isn't prison, where we starve you."

"Cora woulda done that."

"Well, we're not Cora or Pan," Bae interjected. "Nobody goes hungry in this house, no matter what you've done." He sniffed the air. "Boy that meatloaf and mashed potatoes and gravy smells good, Em! And so do the peas with onions."

"And the rolls," Henry added. "I love crescent rolls!"

He began setting the table, eager to eat, and even more so to keep his parents distracted from asking about his report card. Perhaps they'd forget about it with all the other things they had to deal with tonight.

Rumple kept Aria entertained by making silly faces and playing peek-a-boo until it was time for dinner. At first he thought he'd be too nervous to eat, but Emma's meatloaf tasted even better than it smelled.

"Mmm! Is this the recipe I gave you?" he asked.

"Yes. I wanted to try it out."

"I thought I recognized it," he said, then ate some more. It was as juicy and tasty as his own.

"Mmm! I even like the peas and I usually hate them." Regina said.

"Cause you're Miss Picky," Killian teased.

Regina glared at him. "No, I just don't like most green things."

"I love veggies!" Belle sang.

"I like anything," Rumple said. When you spent half your growing years hungry, you basically learned to eat whenever food was offered. "Except bugs and liver."

"Bugs?! Eww!" Regina looked grossed out.

"You ate BUGS?" Henry gasped. "Why?"

"Some people had to," Belle replied.

"Cause there was nothing else and I was hungry," Rumple admitted, not really wanting to discuss this. "But that was a long time ago." He ate another helping of meatloaf and potatoes and peas. "S'why you oughta thank God you got real food to eat n' a warm bed to sleep in and a family who loves you."

Bae nodded. "Rumple's right. Because there are kids that have none of that."

"Were you one, Bae?" asked Regina.

"No. Papa always made sure I had blankets and was warm and we were a family. Sometimes we didn't have too much to eat but we never starved."

He had starved later though, on his own, as a thief on the streets, and he had to admit that Rumple had always provided for him well. He just hadn't appreciated it until he no longer had it.

Emma could have told the kids plenty about being cold and hungry when she left the orphanage, but she didn't want to dwell on those memories. That time was done and she had what she had always wanted now-a job, a family, and a place where she belonged.

"Wonder if the Browns need money," Killian said.

Henry was still praying his parents would forget it was report card day when Emma brought out the blueberry crisp and ice cream. Normally he loved this dessert, with a helping of vanilla ice cream in the middle, but today he found he couldn't eat a bite.

What would his dad say when he saw his math grade?

"Henry, isn't today report card day?" his father asked.

"If they do, maybe we could give 'em an xtension on their rent," mused Rumple. He yawned, feeling sleepy now that he had eaten and he only ate half his blueberry crisp. His mind was growing fuzzy with sleep and his adult memories were fading gradually.

Henry froze with the fork halfway to his mouth. "Umm . . ." was all he could think of to say. In his mind he was thinking _Aww crap! Why can't_ _he forget?_

"Let's see it," Emma said with a smile.

"Now? But . . . what about them?" he waved at the other kids, who were all staring at him curiously.

"We wanna see too!" Belle shrilled excitedly.

"Yeah, how'd you do?" Regina wanted to know.

 _Terrible in pre-algebra_ , Henry thought with a groan _. And not too good in history either._

He felt like he was before a review board as he went to fetch his backpack. He spent some time aimlessly rummaging through it, delaying as much as possible.

Until Rumple huffed and said, "Do ya need help? I tol' you ya need to be better organized, dearie." He slid from his chair and came over to where Henry was on the couch.

"No, I'm fine." Henry protested.

"Lemme see," Rumple said, and he gently shoved Henry away and found the report card right where it was supposed to be. "Here it is!" he handed it to Henry.

"Thanks, Rumple," his grandson said, wishing a hole would open up and swallow him.

He shuffled over to where Emma and Bae waited expectantly.

"Umm . . . here."

Emma held out her hand.

You would have thought it was a lottery ticket the way the four other children attempted to see the results.

"Hey! Settle down!" Bae ordered. "You can see after Emma and I do."

"Aww!" Killian groaned. But he sat back down in his seat.

Meanwhile, Henry prayed Bae was struck blind for a few moments, or had Alzheimers.

Emma opened it up, her eyes wide with shock. "Henry? What...what happened?"

Then he wished he could have hacked into the school computers and tinkered with the grading system.

"Umm . . . well . . ." her son looked away.

"Well what?" Bae took the report card from his wife and frowned. "You got a D- in pre-algebra? Henry, how did you get this? I told you if you were having problems to come to me." Then his eyes lit on American History. "A C, when last semester you had a B+? And what's this about missed assignments?"

Henry gulped. "Err . . . I forgot a couple of papers."

"Cause you were too busy playing Halo," Killian chimed in.

"Thanks, buddy!" Henry glared at his little brother.

Bae folded his arms across his chest. "Is that true? You were playing video games instead of doing your schoolwork? Henry, you know how your mom and I feel about school."

"I was gonna do them, Dad," his son declared sullenly. "But I forgot and Miss Peterson wouldn't let me do any make up ones."

Bae glanced at his wife. "You know that's not an excuse, right, Emma?"

"Yes. You will be doing them from now on because you won't be seeing your game consoles until those grades come up."

"But Mom. ..!"

"No buts. Those grades are coming up. School is more important."

"But Mom! I have a tournament coming up!"

"You're just going to have to miss it now aren't you?"

"You can spend an hour or two after dinner being tutored by me in algebra," Bae said. "And we'll see about your grandpa and grammy helping you with history once they come back."

"Dad . . . how do you even know advanced math? You didn't go to school here," his son muttered.

Bae's eyes narrowed. "What's that have to do with the price of gold, young man? Are you trying to say I'm dumb because I have no formal education?"

That actually wasn't true, Bae had attended college level therapy courses and was on his way to getting his Masters now. He had taken a GED before he began taking courses while in New York.

Emma scowled at their son. "Henry Mills Gold, you will not talk to your father that way!"

"No, but . . . I hate math, it's a waste of time!" his son grumbled.

"It's not. Without math, you can't make a living and people can cheat ya," Rumple put his two cents in.

Henry shot him a dirty look. "And who asked you?"

Rumple flinched. "Ya don't need to ask, I'm right. Aren't I, Bae?"

Bae patted Rumple's head. "You sure are, buddy. Henry, you watch how you talk to Rumple. And me. This attitude is going to get you in more trouble than your grades will."

"Yeah, be nice," Belle added.

"Or else Dad's gonna throw you in the brig," Killian warned.

"If you'd studied, ya wouldn't b in trouble," Regina said sassily.

"Would all of you just shut up?" Henry yelled. "Nobody in this family knows how to mind their own business!"

At his loud tone, Miri woke and began crying, and Aria started too.

"Now look what ya done!" Regina huffed. "Gotten the babies upset!"

Henry stormed out of the kitchen and into his room.

Emma groaned. "And now here it is...the grouchy teenager phase."

Bae rubbed his forehead. "Somebody shoot me! If he's anything like I was . . . "

"That could be scary!"

"Gee thanks, hon." Bae rolled his eyes. "I'm lucky though Papa didn't have to deal with me when I was fifteen and sixteen, he might have gone round the bend or worn out his hand on my butt."

"I was no better at sixteen," Emma admitted.

"Well, here's hoping we get lucky," Bae chuckled. Then he snorted and said, "Go on, say it."

"Say what?"

"In what world am I living in?" her husband asked.

"Or I was gonna say let me know when you wake up."

"Yeah, that too." He sighed and picked up Miri, who was fussing. "Hey, baby sister, I hope you behave better than me when you're sixteen. Otherwise Papa's gonna drop dead."

He went to heat up a bottle for her while Emma cleaned up a drooly Aria, saying, "Okay, kids, time for you all to get in jammies."

Luckily he still had the pajamas they had bought when the Nevengers had been toddlers and lived with them.

"We still have our old rooms?" asked Regina.

"Yes you do. Come on. Let's get you ready for bed."

They put Miri in Aria's room and Rumple in Killian's room while Regina and Belle returned to their old room, pleased to see that everything was just as they left it after their Disney adventure. With every passing second their memories of their adult lives were fading and they were once again remembering the joys of their second childhood.

And tomorrow they would start another adventure.

A/N: Sorry this took so long to be updated, but CJ had some health issues and I was trying to finish Christmas Wrapping, which is now done. Hope you all like!


	3. A Mistaken Identity Mishap

**~ A Mistaken Identity Mishap and New Team Members ~**

 **Author's Notes: David Molk originally appeared in TNT's Murder In The First from 2013-2016 and some of his backstory was developed by CJ in a Once/Murder In The First roleplay she's in.**

Nick stopped by the house the following morning to remind Emma that the new deputy they were thinking of hiring had arrived that day, shocked when she informed him her in laws and Regina were toddlers again.

"I'm working on the potion to change them back but it's gonna take a while. You talk to this guy yet?"

"No. His wife just had a baby and they've been busy with the move."

"Well when I talked to Jim Koto, his lieutenant, the guy said Molk's been with the SFPD twenty years and has worked everything from vice to homicide. Kinda surprised he isn't gonna go after my job!"

"He probably just wants to settle in a nice quiet place. I know the feeling," Nick said. "The Bay has a crime rate as high as Orlando, probably higher.

"Maybe I better let you ask all the questions."

Bae entered the kitchen. "Hey Nick. What's up?"

"I was just reminding Emma I'll need her to come over to the station to interview the applicant for the vacant deputy spot. We haven't talked to him yet but we did talk to his superior in San Francisco and he seems like he'd be a good fit here."

Three sleepy toddlers shuffled into the kitchen behind him along with a calmer Henry. The moment his parents saw his report card it felt as if the weight of the world crashed down on him. Now he wished he'd spent more time studying than playing Halo on his Xbox. After his tantrum Emma and Bae went to his room to have another talk with him, emphasizing the importance of a high school and college education.

"Hon if I had it to do all over again, I would've gone to school to learn criminal justice," Emma said. "Nick has more law enforcement experience than me and by rights he should be sheriff instead of me."

"Mom! Are you thinking about resigning?"

"No…not unless everyone thinks I should."

"But everybody likes you being sheriff!" Henry protested.

"I know, Henry,but if you want to get a good job and always be confident that you deserve to be in it, you need the right education. Spending all your time paying Halo isn't gonna do that for you."

"Even as poor as we were back in our world, Henry,your grandpa and I took every chance we could to learn new things," Bae added. "Had Papa's circumstances been different, he could've been a lawyer in our world or something damn close to it. But make no mistake, even before he became the Dark One, my papa was smarter than anyone gave him credit for because he took the time to learn and they were always in for a surprise when they underestimated him. So let's get those grades back up okay?"

"Okay, Dad."

"What're we havin for breakfast?" Regina demanded when Henry picked her up and put her in the chair beside him, the place she always liked to sit when she was her toddler self.

Emma smiled. "I made all your favorites."

"Yay!" Rumple cried excitedly, taking his customary place between Belle and Killian.

"Hey Mom, are you gonna let them go to school with me today?" Killian inquired.

"I wasn't planning on it."

"Aww come on, Emma! We wanna go to school! S'not like the daycare we went to with the Blue Butthole!" Rumple pleaded.

"Please…." Belle begged. Suddenly four pairs of eyes were on Emma giving her the sad Look.

"Oh come on you guys….don't do that!" she whined knowing they were impossible to resist when they gave her that look. Aria and Miri mimicked them from their own places. "Don't you two start either!"

Henry burst into laughter. "Not gonna win, Mom, so you may as well give it up!"

"Oh all right! I'll talk to Jasmine and see if she'll let you sit in class today!"

"YAY!"

"Gotta warn you guys….it can be boring since we know most of that stuff already but you're gonna love storytime with Jasmine."

"Don't care. Still wanna go to school!" Belle cried.

"We have to go to the station first. I need to interview a new deputy," Emma informed them.

"You hirin?" Rumple asked her.

"We need to yes."

"You check this person out an make sure he's not a psycho?"

Henry spit out his chocolate milk laughing. Regina swung her fork at him. "You jerk! Lookit what you did to my pancakes! Now they got chunks in 'em!"

"Sorry, Regina. You can have mine." He scooped up the ruined pancakes and threw them in the garbage and replaced them with three of his and used the cookie cutter to make them apple shaped.

"We checked him out. He has a lot of experience. He umm…used to work for the San Francisco PD as an inspector."

"Ooh! What if he's 'Spector Gadget…with all that stuff that comes outta him like springy legs, the helicopter in his hat?" Regina asked.

"Nope. He's prolly like Dirty Harry and 'vestigates dead people." Rumple mused.

"Rumple! When have you watched Dirty Harry?"

"He always did, Em," Bae chuckled.

Rumple turned his son holding his hand out shaped like a pistol. "Go ahead…make my day."

"God, I've missed this!" Emma said with a laugh. "Okay guys, eat up. Bae, is Archie okay with you taking the morning off to watch Aria and Miri?"

"Yeah. I told him I would go in later." He picked up his daughter and sister. "We're gonna have a lot of fun today!"

After having so much trouble with outsiders the first time they were turned into children, Rumple and Regina altered the protection spell on the town that forbid anyone other than residents from the Enchanted Forest, their kin and those they trusted from entering. Early that morning a blue minivan with California plates approached the town line. The driver stopped and got out, standing at the line that had been drawn there by the dwarves after the curse was broken while his family was sleeping in their warm vehicle.

Anyone who spotted the man at the town line would automatically assume he was Archibald Hopper, Storybrooke's resident psychologist. Everything about them was virtually identical with two exceptions; this man did not wear glasses and dressed differently. In California, he was former SFPD homicide inspector David Molk but back in the Enchanted Forest he had been Jasper, the most loyal knight in Prince Phillip and Princess Aurora's kingdom and protector of their precious daughter Rose until Regina's Dark Curse sent everyone to this land. It had been Maleficent's wish that her bitter rivals be sent somewhere other than Storybrooke and remain cursed since they were kin to those who were taken there. Also at her request Regina made certain that all of them would be miserable in this new land since Maleficent's second sleeping curse attempt had been thwarted by Rumplestiltskin. Neither of them counted on Emma Swan breaking the curse and restoring the memories of all, even those outside Storybrooke's boundaries. Now after so many years, David would finally have the chance to meet the brother he never knew he had until just before the curse was cast and raise his family in a safer place where he didn't have to lie about his identity any longer. His family was still asleep when he got back in the car and drove into town. The Molk family's new home was across the street from the Golds and Melanie, purchased for them by Phillip and Aurora over their son-in-law's fierce protests that he wanted to buy the house himself. Also they and many of their former knights and servants made certain that everything was moved in before the family arrived.

Sapphira watched with interest as a car drove up to the vacant house across the street and a couple got out followed by three young children. The woman was holding a baby in her arms. The fae's eyes widened when the man approached the front of the walk and took down the For Sale sign and kissed the woman holding the baby. Then she laughed.

"Oooh wonder how that Brit witch is gonna like it when she hears the cricket's shacking up with another girl? Bet the kid's his!"

Across the street; David Molk set the For Sale sign beside the trashcan to be picked up later in the week and put his arm around his wife's shoulders. "You ready to see our new house, Sleeping Beauty?"

Elizabeth Molk smiled at her husband. "Lead the way my blue knight. Okay guys, let's go see our new house!"

The couple's three older children Jasper, Cami, and Devon nearly knocked their father over when they ran to the front door. "Daddy, c'mon unlock the door! We wanna see!" Devon demanded impatiently.

"Okay, calm down…gotta get the keys out!" their father chuckled.

"David, you need to get ready for your interview at the sheriff's office too," Elizabeth reminded him.

"I know. But the kids need a nap…"

"We'll just take a nap when we get back."

"Hey, cricket! Your wife know you're shackin up with another girl?" they heard someone yell from across the street and saw a little girl standing on the sidewalk making faces at them.

David and Elizabeth turned around and frowned at the child. "I don't know who you are but you need a lesson on the right way to greet new neighbors!" David said sternly.

"Where are your parents?" Elizabeth asked.

Melanie came out of the house. "Sapphira, what are you….Archie?"

"He's havin an affair with another girl!" Sapphira singsonged.

"Beth, you stay here with the kids. I'll handle this." David said angrily and started walking across the street.

Jasper Molk snickered at his younger brother and sister. "Boy are THEY gonna get it!"

"Why's that mean girl say Daddy's havin a 'fair with 'nother girl when he's married to Mommy?" Cami asked.

"Cause she's mean an rude," Devon answered.

"Daddy's gonna give 'em the Molkitude," Jasper said.

"Oh boy," Beth giggled, using one of her husband's favorite expressions. "I think they'd better run!" She walked down the sidewalk and scowled when she recognized the woman standing across the street. "And SHE won't be able to run fast enough!" she muttered under her breath. It had been years since she'd seen Maleficent, believed to be dead after a vicious battle with her father but Philip had only wounded her and she reappeared during Beth's sixteenth birthday celebration to unleash her altered version of the sleeping curse on the frightened princess.

As Archie approached them Melanie immediately realized that the man standing before her was not Archie at all but his twin Jasper, a knight in Aurora and Phillip's kingdom, a brother Archie was not even aware he had because the child had been sold to her by his wastrels of parents in exchange for a cure from a plague they'd been infected with during their travels, the same plague they tricked Gepetto's parents into thinking they had an elf tonic cure for. Thinking she could not care for the child herself she offered him to Rumplestiltskin and Rumple, still in grief over the loss of his beloved Bae had been given a vision that the child needed to be placed in King Hubert's kingdom as a knight squire to his heir Prince Phillip and that the same age freezing process that had been given to Archie when he was made into a cricket also affected his brother. Also, the curse would tear him away from the land he loved and the princess he loved, Rose; Aurora and Phillip's daughter.

"J…Jasper!"

"It's been a long time…Maleficent!" he hissed.

"Why are you callin him Jasper! That's Archie!" Sapphira corrected her.

"No it isn't, Sapphira. This is his brother. You don't remember him."

"How would she? She's a kid."

"She's the Blue Fairy regressed into a child."

David stared down at the child, smirking. "Oh is she? What crap did she pull this time to get such a punishment?"

Sapphira glared up at him. "Now I remember you and you are as simple minded as that idiot you look like!"

"And being a child again hasn't done much for you. You're just as mean and rotten," David retorted. "That little advice you gave Aurora and Phillip about how to protect Rose from the curse: did you really think the 'let's send our kid away' scenario would work a second time? Thank God Rumpletsiltskin had more brains in his head and offered us a better solution…until that witch Regina scattered us all to the winds!"

"What of Rose…?" Melanie inquired delicately. "Is that woman…?" She tilted her head in his wife's direction.

"She goes by Beth now and she never went under your damn sleeping curse thanks to Rumple but thanks to the crap memories you had the Evil Queen plant in her mind when I finally found her and married her the first time she thought I was having affairs when I worked late at the station and divorced me while she was pregnant with our first son and neither of us knew it! We both went from one bad relationship to another until we finally got our memories back and got back together with our son and the kids she had with that abusive bastard she called her second husband."

"Jasper…David…I'm sorry….I know you want revenge but I won't harm you or your family. I've changed."

"No, I don't. I want a place I can raise our kids where we won't have to lie about who we are and yes I do want to meet my brother. It's long overdue. And I'm gonna hold you to your word that you've changed," he growled, glaring at her.

Sapphira kicked him. "None of you have any brains trusting the Dark One!"

"Sapphira! Apologize! Immediately!" Melanie scolded.

"To him, never!"

David shook his head. "I don't understand this at all. Why are you suddenly turning over a new leaf and she isn't?"

Melanie pulled him aside.

"I've been wanting to change for some time, David…and I'm not the only one. Regina is different now and Rumplestiltskin is no longer the Dark One. Still, I do regret my actions….every one of them. And I have agreed to raise Sapphira to try to prevent her from going down my dark path. It hasn't been easy."

"I'm still angry for what happened to our family but had you not sent me to Rumple I never would've met Beth in the first place and like I said, all I want to do now is raise my kids somewhere we don't need to lie about who we are."

"Your children know who you are?"

"We had to tell them, yes." He glanced down at his watch. "I have to be down at the station to talk to Sheriff Swan."

"We'll talk again soon, David." Melanie said with a smile.

Beth was waiting for her husband when he walked across the street. "Well, did you tell that witch off?" she demanded.

"We'll talk about it on the way over to the station."

Melanie took her daughter's arm and led her into the house, giving her a Look. "You are not going to cause any more trouble today, Sapphira. I forbid it."

Sapphira glared at her defiantly. "You think you're better than me but I remember every bad thing you did and now they're all coming back to bite you in the butt! Congratulations!"

"I am making amends for my mistakes and that is something I am trying to teach you to do."

"I don't make mistakes," she huffed.

And that pride, Melanie thought sadly, would be her child's downfall. She sat the child down to give her a stern lecture, hoping that this time it would not fall on deaf ears as so many did previously. Sapphira's obstinacy pushed her patience to its limits but she kept that image of the Dark One dagger with Sapphira's name engraved on it always in the back of her mind when she needed a reminder of why she could not give up. Yes, the darkness needed a vessel to maintain the stability of the Balance but were it to fall into the hands of one without conscience the destruction it would leave in its wake threatened all the realms.

After Melanie went into the kitchen to start breakfast Sapphira grabbed the handset to the cordless phone off its cradle and began dialing, giggling wickedly. The phone rang several times before she heard the familiar accented voice of Archie Hopper's wife on the other land.

"Missus Hopper, you know what your husband's been up to today?" she giggled mischievously

"Sapphira, your mum know you're playing pranks again?" Selene demanded.

"It's not a prank. He's shackin up with another girl right on my street and she has kids! I saw him kissing her!"

"Stop your lying. He's at the office."

"No he's not. He moved some girl in with three kids and a baby next door."

"I don't have time for this nonsense, Sapphira. Good bye."

"I'm telling the truth! You'll see!" she taunted.

Selene shook her head. "I'd better warn Archie." She grabbed her keys.

Since the kids weren't due to be at school until later in the morning, Emma decided to let them stay with her at the station until she and Nick finished interviewing their deputy applicant. Emma was nervous, hoping she wouldn't sound amateurish to the veteran inspector, grateful she had Nick at her side to give her confidence a much needed boost.

"Stop it, Em. You're good at this job. Everyone knows it. The guy's not gonna try to take your place."

Emma paused in her pacing. "I hope you're right, Nick."

"I am. Now sit down and get some coffee in you."

All eyes were on David Molk when he walked into the police station, several people addressing him as Archie. He sighed. His secret was going to be out before lunchtime at the rate things were going and his plans to tell his brother the truth himself would be shot to hell. He raised his hand and knocked once on the closed door to the sheriff's office unaware that a group of toddlers were eyeing him with interest.

"What's Archie doin here?" Killian mused.

"That's not Archie," the young sorcerer announced.

"Huh? It has to be, he's just not wearin' his glasses."

"Nope, Rumple's right. S'not Archie. There's something different 'bout him. Can feel it," Regina confirmed.

"So who is he?" Belle asked.

"Dunno, but we gotta find out. He's an outsider an outsiders bring trouble!" Rumple glared at the adult's back as he walked into Emma's office.

Nick and Emma were also shocked to see what appeared to be Archie's doppelganger sitting in front of them. They conducted their interview as they would have with any other deputy until it came to the subject of his past and how an outsider managed to find his way into their town. It was then that he was finally able to reveal his true identity.

"…So Archie doesn't know about you? How?"

"I didn't know he was Jiminy Cricket until right before the curse hit and I had to protect Beth. Rumple told us the sleeping curse would have been activated by the first spark of true love but he gave my wife a talisman to protect her not against love but the sleeping curse. Somehow Maleficent got wind of it and asked Regina to heighten Beth's insecurities with the Dark Curse and make her doubt anyone who loved her, especially me. We didn't find each other again until right before our oldest was born and we were only married four months when she divorced me thinking I was having affairs instead of working late. Her second marriage was worse. He was physically abusive to her and neglected the kids. We were still friends but when I found out what he was doing to her and the kids I made him hit the bricks. After the curse broke we were already back together but now we remembered who we were…and had to get out of San Francisco before anyone else found out. It was hard leaving my old unit behind."

"This place has been pretty quiet," Emma knocked on her desktop. "But we have more people coming in now that the curse is broken and a few outsiders snuck in and caused trouble. That's why I want to be fully staffed and you and Nick have the most law enforcement experience out of any of us."

"I'm not after your job," he reassured her.

"I know…but I just had a baby…and I want to be able to spend more time with her."

"That's another reason why we left the city. Beth is a writer and she already works from home but I want to be home more with her and the kids, especially now that we have the baby."

"You'll have time to do that here but I don't need to tell you how difficult the holiday season can be. We close the office but the 911 system can get a hold of any of us in an emergency. The only incidents we've had so far have been tempers flaring at the stores."

"I'd rather be dealing with that than seeing kids killing each other, our DA killing someone drunk driving, a Steve Jobs wannabe strangling his pregnant girlfriend to death, an NFL player being killed in a murder for hire and a corruption ring in our department. And that was all within the last three years!"

"We've seen some of those stories on the news. No wonder you're burned out."

"Retirement is a beautiful word….I'd rather retire in a few years working somewhere quiet than there."

Emma held out her hand. "Welcome to Storybrooke, Deputy Molk." He shook both of their hands.

"Thank you. Do you have a vending machine? We didn't have time to eat breakfast."

"Out in the hall. You go ahead and grab something while I get this paperwork put away. My son's in the playroom with a few of his friends…and I hope they're behaving!"

David chuckled. "I'll keep an eye on them."

"Oh my God! Rumple, it's one of those alien clones! He's got the green goo for blood!" Killian cried after Archie's double walked past the playroom. "We gotta find something sharp an stick 'im!"

"Why?" Regina asked him.

"Cause if ya stick 'im in the back of the neck he dies but ya gotta be careful. The green blood will burn ya!"

"We gotta be sure first," Rumple insisted. "If he's not an alien Emma's gonna throw us in jail for murder!"

"If he bleeds red, he's human," Regina said.

"Yeah but we're not 'sposed to hurt people an make 'em bleed so we can see the blood. It's bad!" Belle reminded them.

"So how we gonna prove he's not a clone?"

"Ummm…."

"What are you guys talking about in here?" they heard Archie's clone ask. The frightened toddlers nearly jumped out of their shoes.

"Ummm….ahh….we….." Killian stammered.

"We were talkin about school…yeah that's it. School!" Rumple said quickly. "We're going to school!"

"Oh then you'll meet two of my kids. Jasper and Dev should be in your class tomorrow."

"Okay ummm…cool."

The man kneeled down and gave them Emma's interrogating Look. "Is something bothering you? You all look like you've seen ghosts or something?"

"Nah. Jus' really wanna go to school!" Regina lied.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, yeah, we're sure."

"Let me give you the same advice I give my kids….you gotta get up early to try to outsmart a cop," he said with a grin. "And you all have that same look my kids do when they're up to something."

Crap! Rumple thought. Think!

Then he remembered Killian saying that magnatite was toxic to the aliens. He summoned the talisman he made of it and held it out in front of him. "You scared of this, dearie?" he demanded with an impish grin, waving it back and forth like a pendulum.

"Aww come on why ain't it flyin into the wall an dyin already!" Killian groaned.

"You said that stuff was 'sposta work, Killian! It's not working!" Belle cried.

"That thing's making me dizzy!" the clone laughed.

"Rumple, what if he's immune! We're gonna get taken up in one of those spaceships, get that black goo put in us and have nasty alien babies!" Regina wailed.

David studied the toddler they called Rumple, not surprised someone had named their child after the sorcerer who was more famous for his mistakes than successes in the kingdom that had been David's home.

"I'm not having nasty alien babies! You go away you mean 'ole alien 'fore I have Mister Common Sense eat you!" Belle threatened.

"You guys think I'm an alien?"

"Ummm…yeah…'cause you look like Archie 'cept you don't wear glasses," Rumple blurted.

"David,I just finished your paperwork…what's going on in here? You guys are pale as sheets!" Emma demanded.

"Your new deputy's one a those alien clones!"Regina accused. "You gotta find some sharp thing an stick him in the back of the neck so's he dies!"

"Seriously guys, enough with the X-Files crap. David's not an alien clone."

"So what IS he then? One a those changelings….baby that got switched or a doppelganger?" Rumple scowled at her. "Better set up the wards just in case,dearie!"

"David, I am so sorry….Rumple doesn't remember because of the regression potion."

David gaped at her. "Are you telling me, HE is Rumple? He's a child again like the Blue Fairy?"

She nodded. "And so is Regina."

"Oh boy!" he sighed. "This really isn't how I wanted Archie to find out about me!"

The kids glared at him. "How d'you know the Blue Butthole?"

"We've ahhh….crossed paths,Rumple." And not in a good way either, David thought bitterly.

"Ya mean you're from where we are? Who are you 'sides looking like Archie?" Belle asked him.

"Kids…" Emma groaned.

"I may as well tell them, Emma. They're kids and like all kids, they'll pester us until we do."

"Okay, everybody have a seat." Emma instructed. The kids gathered in a circle on the floor by David's feet.

"I'm Archie's brother. His twin. He doesn't talk about me because he doesn't even know I exist. Our parents…ahhhh….gave me away."

"His parents were jerks! I 'member him saying so!" Rumple exclaimed.

"Yeah…ummm...I was given to Melanie but she didn't think she could take care of me so she gave me to Bae's father but ahhh….he already had Bae so he decided he would find me a good home and he placed me in Prince Phillip's house. I was his knight squire and later after he became king and married Aurora I was one of his knights."

"Ooh you lived with Sleeping Beauty and Phillip!" Belle clapped her hands excitedly. "What didja do there?"

"I was charged with protecting their daughter, Rose. She was cursed like her mother."

"Uh oh! Did she fall asleep and need a prince to wake her up with true love's kiss?"

"Welll…ummm…in a way…but it wasn't a prince that broke her spell."

Belle leaned forward. "Oooh! You're her true love right?"

"Yes," he smiled.

"And you got married, had babies and lived happily ever after!"

"Yes we did," Beth said from the doorway. "Hello. I'm Beth, David's wife."

Belle eyed her suspiciously. "Thought your name was Rose!"

"It was back in our world but I go by Beth here or Elizabeth."

Killian smiled at the three toddlers standing beside her. "Hi guys! We're the Nevengers!"

"The what?" Cami asked him.

"The Nevengers. We go on 'ventures an'kick the butts of bad people!" Killian held out his hand to her. "I'm Killian an' these are my friends, Rumple, Regina, an' Belle. We got other members you're gonna meet later but we're the original team."

"The Nevengers?" Beth's eyes widened.

"What's a Nevenger?" David asked Emma.

"Oh these rugrats have a little club….and ahhh….they've seen some action. More than they should," Emma said under her breath.

"Yep! Rumple and Regina wiped the floor with Rasputin and Cruella De Vill, we sent Rumple's dick dad Peter Pan to hell and busted a bad Santa!" Killian bragged.

"I'm Devon an this is my brother Jasper, our sister Cami an' Peanut," Devon shook Killian's hand.

"Why's one of your kids named Peanut? It look like a peanut?" Regina wondered aloud.

"Regina!" Emma gasped.

"Umm….no…ahhh….her real name is Elsa." Beth replied.

"She gots ice powers like the real Elsa?"

"I don't know," David answered honestly.

"I would," Rumple spoke up. "If she's got an aura we can see it, huh Regina?"

"Yep!"

"And if she's a true love baby like Emma she'll have magic," Belle said confidently. "Why'd you name her Elsa and Peanut?"

"Cami named her Elsa because she loves Frozen and she and the boys called her Peanut because they ahhh…saw what she looked like in Beth's tummy when she just started growing and said she looked like a peanut. The name stuck and she seems to like it."

"Daddy, we wanna be Nevengers!" Devon cried.

"Oh boy!" David exclaimed, feeling he would be losing his hair sooner than he expected.

"Who named their children after Rumple and the Evil Queen?" Beth whispered to Emma. Emma pulled the couple aside while the children were getting to know each other.

"They ARE Rumple and Regina but they accidently got a regression potion used on them. The other child is Rumple's wife Belle and Killian used to be Captain Hook but he wanted to stay a child so my husband and I could raise him right. Regina has changed, so has Rumple. I know you both have your reasons to be upset but they've come a long way from that. And Rumple isn't the Dark One anymore."

"They may have changed but the Blue Fairy hasn't!" Beth hissed. "I'd be willing to bet she is going around town accusing David's brother of being unfaithful to his wife and David hasn't even met him yet!"

"You better go tell him before someone else does. I'll see you later so we can make the announcement you're joining our staff. Good luck with your brother."

He had a feeling he was going to need it.

"Emma says your dad's gonna be our new deputy," Regina said to the Molk children. "He meet Archie yet?"

"Nope but he wants to."

"Cool!"

"Only one problem….you guys live across from the Blue Butthole. You gotta watch out for her. She's real mean n'nasty," Rumple warned them.

"Yeah we know. Daddy went over and gave her the Molkitude," Jasper giggled.

"The what?"

"Molkitude. It's what Mommy calls it when we're in bad moods or don't take crap."

"Yeah well she's done lots of stuff to us."

Jasper made a face. "She's done stuff to my parents too. She never told our dad about Uncle Archie when he was a knight in Grampa's court and tried to get him and Grammy Aurora to lock her away in a tower so she wouldn't fall in love and go to sleep. She's gonna learn the hard way you don't wanna mess with the Molks. So you guys doing anything right now?"

"We're tryin to find out what happened to the Browns," Killian said and began filling them in on the case.

"Okay guys we gotta get movin!" their father called out.

"Awwww! We wanna stay here with the Nevengers!" Devon whined.

"We have to meet Uncle Archie and Aunt Selene then you need naps," David said firmly.

"Mister Molk, can we come over an see 'em after they nap?" Killian begged.

"Please…." Rumple, Regina and Belle gave him the puppy dog look.

"You might as well admit defeat, Molk. Even I can't resist that," Emma warned. Nick laughed beside her.

"Neither can I."

"Oh, all right!"

"YAY!"

"I think I lost part of my hearing. C'mon you guys have to get to school!" Emma said to her charges.

"We'll see ya later, dearies!" Rumple said with a smile and limped out of the room followed by his wife, friend, and grandson.

"I have to admit David, Rumple is cute as a child," Beth said softly. "So is Regina."

"Oh boy! God help us both if our kids end up in one of their adventures!" David sighed.

"I don't know what bollocks that girl is trying to pull but I don't like it!" Selene was saying to her husband.

"I don't know what is going on in this town but I've had three calls this morning from people accusing me of cheating on you, claiming I'm hiding my mistress and children at the house across the street from Rumple's. Then I received this!" Archie handed her a fax with a photo on it of the mysterious couple outside the once vacant house. "I've been getting them every ten minutes!" He crumpled the latest one and threw it in the trashcan. "And I've been here all morning!"

"I know love and we'll figure it out. Maybe we should call Emma."

They heard a knock on the office door. "Doctor Hopper?"

"Emily, please not now!" he cried frantically.

"I'm sorry Doctor but ummm…I think we can finally get this nasty business straightened out. There's a couple here to see you."

"All right," he groaned. "Send them in."

The moment his visitors walked in the door Archie had his answer to why he was getting vicious phone calls all morning. A man that could have been his identical twin stood on the other side with a petite brunette on his arm. The two men stared at each other for several minutes taking in the similarities and differences between them. They had the same shades of ginger hair and blue eyes were the same height with the only differences being that Archie was wearing glasses and their outfits were different. Archie was dressed in a smoky grey business suit with a maroon tie, his twin wore a navy blue pullover with brown slacks.

"W…Who are you?" the therapist asked nervously.

"My cursed name is David Molk but my real name is Jasper. I'm…I'm your brother," he said in the same voice.

"What? Archie, you never told me you had a brother much less a twin!"

"I don't!" he insisted. "And this joke has gone on far enough. Who glamored you to look like me?" he demanded angrily.

"I am your brother!" David insisted. "Our parents sold me to Maleficent when I was two months old for the elf tonic when they caught the plague! That's where they got the idea for the damn scam they pulled on Gepetto's parents years later. I would tell you to ask Rumple about it but he's a child again and so is Regina. If you want further proof you can ask Melanie. She knows who I am."

"If you are my brother why didn't you come to see me years ago?"

"I didn't find out the truth until right before the Dark Curse hit and by then I couldn't do anything!"

"I think we'd all better sit down," Selene said gently.

"Yes we should," Beth Molk agreed. "I'm Beth Molk, David's wife," she said to Selene.

"I'm Selene, Archie's wife."

Archie was still upset yet he was willing to give the man the benefit of the doubt. He took his usual place in his recliner while David, Beth and Selene sat down in the couch while David told them his story, Beth holding his hand as he spoke. When he finished, his eyes met those of his brother's. "All I want now is to settle down here and raise my family away from all the chaos of the city."

"You should make some kind of public announcement to silence the wagging tongues, Archie," Selene suggested.

"Emma was gonna introduce me as her new deputy this afternoon. Might as well kill two birds with one stone," David laughed nervously.

Archie rose from his chair and hugged his brother. "I'm sorry I was so hostile earlier. I'm still trying to take all this in."

"We all are," Beth said sympathetically. "But you'll be happy to know you have two nephews and nieces who want to meet you. They're out in the hall."

"Oh bring them in!" Selene pleaded.

David rose from the sofa and opened the office door. "Jasper, can you guys come in here!"

Three excited toddlers raced into the room, the oldest holding a baby in his arms.

Little Cami glanced over at her aunt. "Lookit, Mommy. Aunt Selene's got a baby growin in her too but it's as big as Peanut was when she was ready to come out!"

David grinned. "You sure you're not having twins, Archie? They run in the family."

"No. Our doctor only said she heard one heartbeat."

"Do you know what it will be or you wait like we did?" Beth asked her.

"We're waiting."

"Daddy, do we havta go nap? Wanna stay here with Auntie Selene and Uncle Archie!" Devon protested.

"How about we all have dinner together at your house. You could use the help unpacking," Archie suggested. "I'll ask my assistant if he wouldn't mind landing a hand either."

"Emma's husband? He's got his hands full with all those kids…including his father!"

"Well ummm….the Nevengers are a helpful bunch when they're not getting into trouble."

"Oh we've met them already and now my kids wanna join them!"

"I've been on vacation with that crew, David. Trust me…be on your toes." Archie chuckled.

David groaned.

The Nevengers old and new were already seated at the table at school discussing the day's events as well as their current mission: Operation Find The Browns. They were all convinced Selma Quickly had something to do with it based on her past history with the family.

"If the Molk kids wanna help that'll be cool," spoke up Annie Carlyle . "But we gotta move fast 'fore that pasty goat lady does something really bad to them."

"We got Mister Molk to let us come see 'em after school," Killian said. "All we gotta do is find a way to 'stract the grownups while we find out what's goin on at the Brown house. We can tell the grownups the Molks wanna see our clubhouse and Henry can take us over there."

"Emma an Bae might not go for it,dearie. Henry's gotta pull his grades up," Rumple reminded him. "Plus we gotta watch the Butthole an keep her from buggin the Molks!"

"Yeah but we can't just do nothin either," Regina frowned. "Nobody else knows something's wrong but us."

"What kinda name is Molk?" Tommy demanded and snickered as he passed their table "Sounds stupid!"

"Tommy, that was rude! Apologize or you can face the wall for five minutes!" Jasmine scolded.

"Don't you guys have anything better to do than pick on everybody?" Rumple demanded.

"Shut it, crip!" Mary retorted. All the other children gasped. They knew it was a mistake to poke fun at Mr. Gold regardless of whether he was an adult or a child.

"Mary, you will be joining Tommy in the corner."

Their two classmates glared at them as they marched over to the corner and faced the wall. Despite the antics of what Killian and his new Nevengers called the "Jerk Table', they all enjoyed their day at school, Belle loving storytime the most. She was even more excited when Jasmine invited her to help her read a story to the rest of the class.

"Kay today I wanna read Sleepin Beauty," Belle announced, smiling as she thought about their new friends. "Once 'pon a time…" she began. All the children listened attentively while she read, many of them remembering sitting in on her storytimes at the library when she was adult. What memories she Rumple and Regina had of being adults faded quickly this time and once again they were enjoying the happy childhood they'd been denied the first time. As soon as school was out they raced outside to meet Bae and Emma on the sidewalk, Bae holding Miri and Aria. Miri held out her arms for her parents. Though they were still toddlers, the infant mage somehow sensed her parents were still there in those small bodies.

"Now can we go see the Molks?" Killian demanded impatiently.

"Your new deputy's family? Archie's twin?" Bae asked her.

"Yes and his kids are already driving him crazy wanting to join the Nevengers," Emma mumbled. "I told Glass we'd meet him at Molk's house to hold the press conference about him joining the department and then Archie and Molk were gonna talk about being twins separated so people don't confuse them."

Bae was reminded of another discussion he had with the therapist when he arrived at the office that day.

 _"Archie, I'm gonna need some help running the shop. I got a visit while I was there cleaning up from Cedric Brown asking me if I would let him work there over the holidays since he got laid off at Weems and Jowels. I really don't want to see a guy outta work over Christmas or any other time but Papa's shop is warded. I'd need his permission to let Brown work there."_

 _"You want me to hypnotize Rumple so you can talk to his adult self?"_

 _"Yeah."_

 _"I was thinking of doing that anyway….I have some questions about Jasper….David….and I'm sure David has some questions too. We can do that after the press people leave."_

 _"Thanks Archie."_

 _"How is Miri handling not having her parents around?"_

 _"It's strange…but she seems to KNOW Papa and Belle are still there, just in different bodies. I don't know if it's because she's a magical child or not."_

 _"It could be. I'm no expert of magic or parenting for that matter but I'm gonna have to be when my child is born. My brother has four kids! Four!"_

 _Bae chuckled. "Looks like you have some catching up to."_

David Molk felt uneasy having a news van parked outside his home, it reminded him too much of the media feeding frenzies he'd been subjected to in San Francisco during the school bus shooting, the murder of NFL quarterback Normandy Parker, the arrest of DA Mario Siletti for vehicular homicide, the arrest of Beth's Hollywood has-been second husband for drug possession and spousal abuse and the corruption in the department. His children had woken up from their naps impatient to see their new friends and having the blue menace across the street did little to ease his mind.

"Just relax, Molk," Nick encouraged as he, Archie, Emma and David took their seats in the dining room while Sidney's crew set up for the interview that would air on the evening news. Peri, Selene, Bae, and Beth took the kids into the living room to keep them occupied. The rest of the Nevengers were also in attendance. The children sat on the floor in a circle, the current Nevengers updating their new members on their mission.

"We gotta do a stakeout," Jasper concluded. "S'what Daddy an Uncle Eddie woulda done."

"Who?"

"Daddy's partner. Eddie Navarro," Devon answered.

"How we gonna 'stract the adults?" Cami asked.

Roland grinned. "Maybe Daddy can help."

Regina shook her head. "He'd tell and you know it, Roland. 'Sides doesn't Emma say we gotta have proof 'fore we accuse someone?"

"We have proof ,dearies. Mister Brown's actin weird and no one's seen the kids or Vangeline. Not buying that stuff bout them being sick."

"And if we run off again Bae's gonna get upset," Belle reminded them.

"What if I said I was gonna take you guys to see the clubhouse?" Henry suggested.

"Good idea!" Killian hi-fived him. "You think your dad an mom would let ya go?" he asked the Molks.

"We gotta try."

Before the press conference started the group was ready to make their move. "Mister Molk, can Dev, Jasper an Cami see our clubhouse?" Killian asked.

"Ummm…now?"

"Yeah."

"I can take them over," Henry offered.

"You have homework to do," his father reminded him.

"I can do it while I watch them."

Beth and David frowned. "I don't know…"

"Daddy, Henry's not a killer like those creeps in San Francisco who shot up that bus!" Jasper exclaimed.

"Jasper!" Beth cried.

"Well he's not!"

"That's enough."

"We came here 'cause we wanted to get 'way from that an live with people who were like you….an here we are. Daddy, we really wanna see it."

"Emma, it's not that I don't trust your son…" David began. She nodded.

"Dearie, nothin's gonna happen," Rumple assured him. "Henry's good at watchin us."

"It's not that far from here Mister Molk and I'll bring them right back."

"Henry, we're counting on you. No mischief," Bae warned. "And umm…before you go Rumple, can you come in the house for a minute?"

"Okay Bae. Why?"

"We just want to make sure you're not having any more bad dreams," Archie said smoothly. "We know you've been through a lot."

"Kay." The toddler followed them into the house. Bae picked him up and laid him down on the sofa, handing him his favorite toy to hold. "You gonna have me sleep?" he asked.

"Just for a little bit. Remember? It's how we chase away those bad dreams."

"Okay."

Archie decided to let Bae conduct the hypnosis session himself as practice. He'd just gotten Rumple off to sleep and was about to awaken his older self when they heard David in the hallway. Archie pulled his brother aside.

"What are you doing in there?"

"Bae is able to reach his father's adult self through hypnosis. He needs to talk to him about something."

"And so do I." He followed Archie into the living room.

"Papa, it's Bae. Can you hear me?"

The toddler frowned. "I'm no' deaf yet, lad," he scolded in his adult voice.

David laughed. "Now THAT's the Rumplestiltskin I remember!"

"I'm sorry I never told you about Jasper, Archie. Regina's damned curse had us all scatterbrained for a long time. I thought he'd end up here with the rest of us."

"Melanie had her send us as far away as she could."

"Melanie's fought her own battle with the darkness, David. She willna harm you. Sapphira on the other hand, be wary of her."

"I'm not upset with you, Rumple," Archie reassured him.

"Now Bae, what's on your mind?"

"Papa, Cedric Brown asked me if he could work in your shop until Emma gets the potion done since he lost his job. I know how you are about strangers being in the place…"

"Something's going on with that family. I'm glad you're here David because we Nevengers may need a little help on this one."

"What do you mean, Papa?"

"Cedric came to see me before I was transformed and pawned some jewelry of the first Mrs. Brown's. And now that you've told me he lost his job it makes sense. But I fear something far more sinister is happening."

"Like what?" David asked.

"The children have been missing school and no one has seen Evangeline either. The Browns never miss school from what my grandson and his friends tell me. That sneaking off we did earlier that we got in trouble for was us trying to find out the truth. Cedric insisted the family was sick but Mrs. Brown's vehicle is missing and he was rather nervous when we talked to him. We think Selma Quickly is somehow involved or that crazy aunt of the late Mrs. Brown's. And of all places for Cedric to want to work, why my shop?"

"Good point, Papa. You think that has something to do with what happened to his family?"

"I do. I don't believe in coincidences, Bae."

David groaned. "I don't like what I'M thinkin' so I'm hoping it's not true."

"What?" Archie stared at his brother.

"Blame it on me being a homicide detective and seeing too much in my years on the force. I hope we're not dealing with a John List."

"Who?"

"I dinna think Cedric is the type that would kill his family, David," Rumple said firmly.

"We all have our breaking points, Rumple."

"No, what I think is that someone, possibly Selma has Cedric's family hostage and is using them to get Cedric to do their bidding." Rumple grinned. "Which is why I give you my permission to let him work in the shop,Bae. It may help us flush out the person or persons behind this."

"Set a trap for them?"

"Something like that. I want you to take me to the shop and have me do a little bait and switch with my inventory. I'll still be able to do the spell as my child self and Regina can help me but we both will need naps afterwards." He smiled. "And David….your wee ones will need some tutoring. They all have magic."

"W…What?!"

"True love, dearie!"

"Yes but…Cami and Devon too? They're Beth's biological children and I adopted them after I made that worthless ex of hers hit the bricks….but…"

"To quote a character in Supernatural, 'family don't end with blood'. In Beth's eyes ALL of her children are yours, not just little Elsa and Jasper. Elsa is a snow mage like her namesake as is Cami. Jasper and Devon are Earth mages. Dinna be surprised if one of them can speak to animals as I do. As Gina and I told you, if they were mages, we'd sense their auras and we did the moment we met them." He giggled impishly. "Gonna be keeping you on your toes, they are."

"Oh boy!"

"Papa, when do you want to go to the shop?"

"Before we go to the clubhouse. The sooner the better. Once we switch the inventory all the items will have locator spells on them and when we find the merchandise, I'm hoping we find the Browns. Bring Emma and Nick in here. I need to talk to them too."

"Okay."

Moments later Bae returned with Emma and Nick. Rumple laid out his plan to the sheriff and her senior deputy, both upset that he hadn't told them about the situation earlier.

"We didn't have proof Emma, only suspicion. Now Cedric's actions are all the proof we need. Something's not right in that house but we have to tread carefully in case the family is being held hostage and Cedric is being watched. Nick and David can handle this with a bit of help from us. I need you working on the potion to change us back."

"You kids find trouble every time you get changed back," she sighed. "All right. I'll get started right away. Miri loves playing with Aria but she misses Mama and Papa being adults but you better watch out. She'll probably want to be a Nevenger as soon as she starts talking and walking!"

"Oh aye…and I can feel my hair turning white already. Now then, here is what we're going to do…"

They came out of the house an hour later, Bae carrying Rumple. He set his toddler father on his feet and he limped over to where Regina stood with his wife, grandsons and their friends. "Hey Gina, we gotta make a pit stop over to t'Bae's papa's shop first!"

"Why you gotta do that, Rumple?" Killian inquired curiously.

Rumple grinned and motioned for them to form a huddle. "Bae said Cedric wants to work there 'cause he lost his job an I think that Selma Quickly put him up to it so they can steal all the stuff outta the shop but we're gonna trick 'em good by switchin all the good stuff with fakes an put spells on it so we can track it!"

"Oooh that's a good idea ,Rumple," Belle cried excitedly. "Then we can find out where 'Vangeline an the kids are!"

"I got another idea….how 'bout we plant some sorta camera in one of em?" Jasper spoke up.

"You mean like a nanny cam?" asked Annie.

"Yeah!" Killian smirked. "Then we can get 'em on tape and then Mom can lock em up in the slammer!"

"What if they're watchin the shop?" spoke up the Professor.

"You leave that to us, dearie." Rumple cracked his knuckles. "They gotta get up real early to be smarter n' the Nevengers."

After the press conference was over, Bae drove over to the Brown house to speak with Cedric about working there while Emma, Nick and David took the kids back to the shop. Following the instructions his adult self had given her, Emma was able to locate the half completed antidote to the deaging potion and the book that listed the ingredients needed to complete it and set up wards to prevent anyone from seeing or hearing the bait and switch operation.

"Hey Rumple…I got an idea...make some of 'em zap 'em too!" Killian giggled.

"I like how you think, dearie!" He waved his hand over a Tiffany lamp. "Then they'll think it has a short in it!"

Belle handed a stack of books to Regina. "Can you make these like Mister Common Sense?"

Regina scanned through the titles, laughing wickedly. "Ooh yeah! But I got a better idea…how bout I make ghosts of the people come out an scare the crap outta em?"

David was having a difficult time trying to keep his youngest daughter from picking up things and trying to put them in her mouth. "Elsa…no…gimme that!" He snatched a ball out of her hands. Devon spotted a bucket of old Legos on the shelf and started constructing something with them, a habit he had at home with his own collection and one of his creations usually ended up in his father's pocket before he left for work. By the time he left the SFPD, a large portion of David's desk had been cluttered with Devon's creations.

"Wha'cha makin, Dev?" Willie asked him. "Oooh, a dog!"

Regina glanced down at the dog, her lips curving into a devilish smile. "Hey Dev….can ya leave that here?"

"Ummm…yeah…why?"

"Cause it's gonna be a nasty surprise for the goat lady."

"Oh! Okay…" the toddler laughed.

"Can ya make a few more?"

"Yup!"

Regina and Rumple were exhausted when their work was finished but all the items had been successfully switched out and some of them would have some rather nasty surprises for their new handlers. Cedric would start work at the shop the following morning, one of his first sets of instructions from Selma had been to disable the security cameras, unaware that Rumple had used Jasper Molk's suggestion and had smaller cameras planted in six of the fake figurines scattered around the shop. The camera would send a video feed back to Nick and David's laptops at home. The trap was set…now all they had to do was wait for the mice to take the bait.


	4. The Nevenger Diversion

~ The Nevenger Diversion ~

Emma was in the middle of a wonderful dream of lying on a beach with Bae while the kids made castles in the sand when she was rudely awakened by her cellphone at six AM the following morning. She opened one eye and reached out to grab it off the nightstand and missed, sending it crashing to the floor. Moments later all the landline phones in the house started ringing and she could hear Regina yelling in the hallway.

"Shut those things up! M'tryin t'sleep!"

Aria and Miri screamed from their cribs.

"What the hell?" Bae moaned, throwing the pillow over his head.

She crawled out of bed and grabbed her phone, seeing her mother's name on the display. "Mom, what's goin on?"

"We've been robbed!" she cried.

She was awake in an instant. "What?!"

"Someone broke into our car and stole everything…all the gifts we bought for Christmas! Your dad had them in the trunk and it wasn't just us…three of our neighbors were robbed too!"

"That must be who's calling the house. Where's Dad?"

"He's talking to our neighbors."

"Okay, I'm gonna call Nick and Molk and we'll be over."

"Em, what the hell's goin on?"

"Looks we've got people breaking into cars and stealing Christmas gifts. They hit my parents and three of their neighbors."

"You think it's the same people that wanted Cedric working in Papa's shop."

"I'd bet my next paycheck on it," she muttered while she dressed and turned on the speaker to talk to Nick.

"Already on it, Em. Our neighbors were robbed too and Peri's assistant said someone broke into the shop and tried to get in the safe."

"I'm gonna call Molk…wait…hold on…that's him on the other line. I'm gonna put you guys on conference, okay?"

"Emma, we've got a problem down here! A few people had their cars broken into last night and it looks like someone tried to break into Rumple and Melanie's houses too." David was saying. "Archie just texted me and told me they hit his place too."

"It's happening all over town. My parents were hit, Peri's shop, and a lot of the neighbors. Where are you?"

"I'm over at Melanie's. She had her place warded and so does Rumple so whoever tried to break in got a little surprise! Found burn marks on Rumple's front porch."

"Anything else?"

"I bagged up what I could with Ziplocs…only things I had handy."

"What about you, Nick?"

"I've got a phone full of photos from the scenes I'm working and cleaned Peri out of her Ziplocs too. I'll bring 'em down when I'm done here."

"My landlines are ringing off the hook so our gang of thieves were busy last night. Any activity on those cameras at Rumple's shop."

"None."

Out in the hall the Nevengers gathered in a huddle. "Holy crap! You hear that! Those guys were reallly busy last night," Killian exclaimed.

Rumple giggled. "Melanie musta set up a ward where if you touch her stuff you get fried!"

"They try to come here we need to make Mister Common Sense bite their butts!" Belle hissed.

Regina conjured a basket of rotten apple bombs. "I say we set up booby traps like in the Goonies."

Killian hi-fived her. "Yeah….and when they come in here they're gonna get worse surprises. I know all kinds of booby traps we can set. But we gotta make sure Mom and Dad don't set 'em off or we're gonna be sent to our rooms with sore butts."

"An me and Regina can set up good wards!" Rumple rubbed his hands together gleefully. "I know…we gotta find a way to get around town an tell people we can set up stuff to protect their houses if those thieves come back!"

"How we gonna do it?" Regina asked him. "Emma's gonna be really busy and Bae's got Miri an Aria to look after." She scowled. "Ya know they're just doin this stuff to throw us off their scent."

"Yeah, s'why we gotta get ahead of 'em cause we're the Nevengers and nobody's quicker n'us at solving stuff!" Killian boasted.

"Oooh I got it!" Belle cried, jumping up and down excitedly. "What if we ask somebody to take us house to house to sing Christmas stuff an give people candy then Rumple an Regina can set up the wards an booby traps! Plus we gotta get ALL the Nevengers to help!"

"Good idea, dearie!" Rumple praised. "People are gonna be mad they got their stuff stolen so we can cheer 'em up an help 'em out at the same time. An if their houses are warded then Emma, Mister Carlyle, and Mister Molk won't be runnin round like chickens with their heads cut off." He made a face. "Whole thing's to 'stract 'em anyway."

Killian grinned. "And if we go house to house we might find out where the Browns are!"

"Okay, Nick…I'm on my over to my parents place…you can meet me there. Molk, I'm gonna need you on Archie's street after you're done at Melanie's," Emma was saying. "Hold on a minute guys…." She put her phone in her pocket and leaned down to kiss the kids. "I'm gonna gone awhile today so you be on your best behavior for Bae, okay?"

Killian rolled his eyes. "Mom, whaddya think we're gonna do…wreck the neighborhood?"

"Do you really want me to answer that question, Killian Gold?" she asked with a twinkle in her eye. "You forget I KNOW you guys too well. No adventures today. This is a matter for the grownups."

"Okay…" they sighed. She gave each of them a kiss and hug goodbye and raced out the door.

Over at the Molk and Carlyle houses, the newest members of the Nevenger team were merely observing while their fathers were conducting their own investigations of the previous night's events, curious to find out what the senior members of their team were planning to do.

"Anybody tries to break in here I'm gonna whack 'em with my teeball bat!" Jasper grabbed his bat out from underneath his bed, his brother doing the same.

"I wanna freeze 'em like Elsa!" Cami cried.

"Hope Mommy lets us outta the house today! We gotta talk to the other Nevengers!" Devon said.

"Then we gotta make sure she does. You know Mommy. She gets all panicky when Daddy's on a big case," Jasper reminded him.

"Jasper, why do you and Devon have your bats out?" Beth asked from the doorway with Elsa in her arms.

"Cause anybody tries to get in here we're gonna smack their balls up into their throats like you said you was gonna do when you thought those bad cops were gonna come after Daddy," Devon replied.

"Put them away. No one is getting in this house," his mother said firmly.

"Yeah well are you gonna let us go out…don't wanna be stuck here!" Cami whined.

"Why do you want to go out today? It'll be better if you stay indoors."

"We wanna see the Nevengers!" they protested.

"Don't even think about it," she warned. "You ARE not going on any adventures so get that thought out of your heads right now."

They glared at her.

"Do not give me the Molkitude today or you'll be spending a lot of time in the corner. I mean it," she threatened. "Now come on. Let's go downstairs and watch a movie or make some things for Daddy to cheer him up when he gets home."

"Okay," they grouched.

"Oh boy!" Beth sighed and followed them downstairs. It was going to be a long day.

"…We gotta talk to Killian and find out what the heck's goin on!" Bobby Carlyle said to his sister. She nodded in agreement.

"I got an idea! C'mon!" They ran outside and met up with their father as he about to get in his car. "Daddy, can you ask if we can stay at Killian's today?" Annie asked him.

"Why?"

"Ummm…cause you'll be busy an so will Mom 'cause her shop got robbed!"

"They're gonna be busy too," he reminded them. "And if ye're thinkin ye'll be goin out on one of your adventures, forget it lass. This is Daddy's business and I dinna want ye gettin hurt!"

"We're gonna be BORED being here!" Bobby complained, giving their father the puppy dog look. "C'mon Daddy. We promise we'll just go over there and play. Please?"

Nick groaned. "Ye better just go over there and play because ye dinna want to be on the Naughty List, do ye?"

"No! We'll just play, we swear!"

"All right. Get in the car. I'll call your mum and Bae on the way."

"YAY!"

 _I really have to work on being immune to that damn look,_ he thought and started the engine.

"Holy shit! Some of this stuff costs more than my rent!"

Back at the hideout the thieves were celebrating their greatest achievement, a daring after hours' robbery spree that yielded them thousands of dollars in cash and merchandise. Their greatest haul would come from Gold's pawnshop that night. Luck was on their side when Cedrick informed them that Bae had gotten his father's child self to remove the wards on all the items making it easier for them to be taken. Their fence in Portland was ready to buy, all they had to do was get the stuff there and with the money from all the robberies, they had enough to leave that dead-end town and into the high life in California. That was where the real money was.

One of the thieves held up a blue sapphire necklace they'd stolen from Archie Hopper's office, a gift for his wife. "Oh well the cricket can afford to buy another one."

Selma snorted and tossed a lingerie set at the trashcan. "I don't give a damn what Snow White wears to bed. I told you idiots to go after the good stuff, not junk!" Three more lingerie sets were thrown out. She opened another bag and brought out several ring boxes. "Now THIS is more like it!"

One of the men was hooking up the plasma television they'd stolen out of Robin Hood's workshop. "Rob from the rich and give to the poor!" he snickered and turned it on. His arm had several burns on it from the wards at Regina, Melanie, and Rumple's homes.

The items they didn't want were thrown into the dumpster to be burned later, mostly clothing, toys and greeting cards they'd removed the cash and gift cards from. After sorting through the rest of the items, Selma went upstairs to give their captives their breakfast, what little of it she was willing to make. The children ate their cold, greasy meal in silence, a plot forming in their minds; an old trick they'd used on Nanny McPhee.

"I hope this works," Evangeline sighed.

"It almost worked with you guys," Simon reminded her.

When Selma returned to collect the dirty dishes she screamed in horror at the sight that met her eyes. "POX!" she screamed and ran out of the room, slamming the door behind her.

"What the hell you screamin about woman?" her lover demanded.

"They have pox! All of them!"

"Oh shit…if THEY got it, WE'RE gonna get it!"

"Then we gotta get rid of them!"

"You idiot…we can't get within a foot of them or we're gonna catch it and you can get pox everywhere!"

"You mean even on…."

"Yes."

"Now what the hell we gonna do with them!"

"Let em up there to rot," one of the men said coldly.

Cedric only had two customers though the shop had been open all morning. He worried for his family constantly making it difficult for him to concentrate on his work. He'd been warned to expect Selma's associates that night and to have the shop prepared for their arrival by disabling the computerized alarm systems, removing all the cash from the front safe and register and packing the smaller items in boxes for transport. He heard the bell above the door tinkle and cringed when he saw Selma Quickly with her latest lapdog.

"My family?" he croaked hoarsely.

"It appears they've caught a case of the pox," Selma announced.

"No…no! You have to let them go! Please! They need to see a doctor!" he pleaded desperately.

"You do your part, we'll do ours," she reminded him though she could care less if that scullery maid and his brats died. It was no less than they deserved for ruining her chances at a life as an aristocrat.

"I'll do it, I'll do it just…just let my family see a doctor!"

 _You fool. They'll never let them see a doctor. They'll just let them die as soon as you finish doing what they want you to do._

 _Unless it's my children up to one of their tricks…_

And trickery was what the Brown children were famous for, recalling an incident where the children claimed to have measles to stay in bed all day and refuse to do anything Nanny McPhee told them until she applied a little trickery of her own. He recalled that Aggie was the only one of his children that never had the chicken pox. His clever children were simply stalling for time until their father could help them. Evangeline, bless her heart often told him that was smarter and braver than he gave himself credit for. He would save his family no matter what it took. He would play the part of the terrified father for now but once the opportunity presented itself he would make certain those thieves were given what they deserved.

Bae was grateful to have his eldest son's assistance keeping watch over a houseful of kids, including his own parents and Regina. Keeping them distracted was not going to be an easy task. He dug out their collection of Christmas movies knowing how much the kids liked them, especially the ones they could sing along to hoping that would keep them busy most of the morning since the schools were now closed for the holidays and the morning storm that swept through the town along with the wave of robberies.

Bae entertained Miri and Aria in the kitchen, playing some of the same breakfast games his father often did when he was too stubborn to eat, the girls laughing and clapping their hands at his silly antics and Aria spit her applesauce all over her chair.

"Now I know you take after me, kid," he said wryly, grabbing the roll of paper towels and wiping up the mess. "Aww man, Miri!" he groaned. She'd managed to grab one of the waffles off his plate and dropped it, giggling at the mess. "Ha ha…now your big brother's gotta cook some more waffles and I gotta tell ya…I stink at it."

In the living room; Killian grabbed the remote and paused The Year Without a Santa Claus. "Henry, we gotta find out what's goin on around town an we got a plan. You gotta help us get Dad to go for it."

Henry sighed. "Lemme guess…I'm the lookout, right?"

"Ummm...not really, dearie," his grandfather replied. "Might need your help on some magic stuff."

The teenager's eyes lit up. "Cool! What's the plan?"

"We talk Bae into takin us out so we can sing Christmas songs to cheer people up but set up wards an booby traps an 'vestigate," Belle said. "Those thieves are just doing this to 'stract Emma, Nick an Mister Molk and we gotta help them out."

Moments later they heard the doorbell ring. "I'LL GET IT!" Regina shrilled and raced to the front door with the others at her heels. "HEY BAE! THE MOLKS ARE HERE!"

"Holy crap M…Regina! You tryin to make us all deaf or what?" Henry exclaimed, grateful his mother wasn't that loud as an adult even when she was angry.

Bae picked up his sister and daughter and came to the front door to find Elizabeth Molk and her brood standing on the porch. "Mrs. Molk, what can I do for you?"

"Help me cure a nasty case of the Molkitude?" she asked hopefully.

"What?"

"We wanna see the Nevengers!" Jasper protested, his siblings following suit.

"I've tried everything I can to keep them calm but they insisted on coming over here…" She glanced over his shoulder. "And it looks like you could use a little help babysitting. David, Emma and Nick will probably be gone most of the day working on those robberies and the kids won't put up as much of a fuss if they're with their new friends."

"Yeah, I really could use the help," Bae mumbled, catching the scent of diapers needing changing. "Okay, okay gonna get you cleaned up," he soothed. "Looks like you have a diaper needing changing too," he said to Beth, Elsa sniffling in her arms. "The nursery's upstairs." Okay guys, go in the living room with Henry while Missus Molk and I take care of the babies."

Rumple smiled. "Sure! C'mon!"

"Okay, so wha'cha got planned?" Jasper demanded once they were alone with Henry.

"Here's what we're gonna do…"

While the children were discussing their diversion strategy Bae and Beth went upstairs to change the babies.

"I'm still getting used to doing this," Bae laughed. "Was David nervous when he had to do it the first time?"

"A little but he caught on quickly. My second husband never wanted to learn anything about child rearing. He made two of them but he never wanted to take care of them. They've always thought of David as their father even before we got remarried because he always went out of his way to spend as much time with them as he did with Jasper."

"I missed out on all of this with Henry but I don't wanna miss a thing with Aria. And my father feels the same way because he missed out on things with me because of that stupid blue bitch. You guys are lucky."

Beth sighed. "David still feels he missed out on a lot of things working with the SFPD. Being a cop is rough on the family life; it's even harder when you're one in a city like San Francisco with a high crime rate. That's another reason why I'm glad we got our memories back. We needed to get out of there, not just because we were displaced fairy tale characters. I didn't want my children living in fear." She picked up Elsa. "Do you need help getting them breakfast?"

"No, I did manage to get that done," he chuckled. "It's keeping them busy the rest of the day we gotta worry about. They'll want to go on one of their adventures."

"I have to admit even I want to know what's going on. It's the investigative journalist in me."

"Me too and though he gives me as many gray hairs as I gave him getting into mishaps, my father always manages to find a solution and so does Emma."

"David always had a detective's brain even when he lived as Jasper in my father's court. Nothing escaped his notice even my attempts to slip past him when I was feeling frustrated with my royal duties. He was the one who suggested we summon Rumple when Maleficent cursed me and was willing to pay the price himself."

"What price did he ask for?"

"That if there ever came a time when he needed David's help with something he would give it. This is that time."

The children were watching How the Grinch Stole Christmas when Bae and Beth joined them in the living room. Everyone was shocked when a large plush Grinch doll appeared on the sofa beside Beth while she was holding Elsa, the baby giving her a Look.

"Whoa!" Killian exclaimed. "Did she do that, Missus Molk?"

"I...I think so."

"Yup. You forgot him so she's mad," Rumple explained.

"He's bigger n'her!"

"So's Cami's Frozen stuff," Devon said.

"Hey Dad can we go out Christmas caroling tonight?"

"Ummm…why?"

"Because we wanna cheer everybody up. Are ya watching this? Christmas doesn't come from a store and it's not gonna get ruined because some jerks stole stuff," Belle said angrily. "So we'll go around town cheering people up."

"Belle I can't sing worth crap. You know that," Bae reminded her.

"YOU don't have to. We will."

"And we don't wanna be stuck in the house all day," Bobby huffed.

"What do you think Beth?"

"We could but Aria, Miri, and Elsa can't be out in the cold too long or they'll get sick. So would all of you and that means you're wearing your warmest clothing."

Rumple and Regina smiled. "We can 'chant Aria, Miri, and Elsa so's they stay warm can't we, Rumple?"

"I know what spell to use!" Henry exclaimed. It was one his grandfather taught him a month earlier if he ever found himself stranded outdoors during the winter.

"Okay then we can go out after dinner." Bae said. He'd gotten a text from Emma saying that she would be working most of the day and needed him to make dinner for the kids. Peri planned on going over to the house to help out now that her shop was officially a crime scene.

The children were excited, hoping that their diversionary tactic would help them locate the missing Browns.

At the Hopper house David was examining his twin's safe. "So you and Selene were the only two that knew the code?"

"It ahhh…it was my office number," Archie said sheepishly. "Selene warned me to change it months ago but I never got around to it. I just used it because that's a number easy for me to remember."

"Either that or get one with a better lock." He loaded all of his evidence bags into the trunk of his squad car and locked it. "I'm hoping we can get everything back before Christmas but if we don't you better pick up something else for Selene."

"I will. Thanks, David. Didn't expect one of your first cases to involve me."

"I've dealt with worse. I'll call you when I find something out."

He met up with Emma and Nick at the station. "These guys are good. I'll give them that," Emma sighed. "They picked the trunk locks with the same kinds of picks I used and slim Jims on the doors. We've got some fingerprints but its gonna take a little while for those to come back. Some of the stolen merchandise was wrapped so they'll be throwing fits when they find toys and clothes in those. We need to work overtime on this one boys or the whole town's gonna be breathing down our necks to get their stuff back by tomorrow night. Not how any of us planned on spending our Christmas Eve."

"Try being called to the scene of a triple homicide on Christmas Day," David said bitterly. "Happened the year of Jasper's first Christmas. The holidays bring out the best and worst in people."

"I've gotten called out on Christmas twice for homicides," Nick added. "I'd rather deal with a bunch of thieves than a murder over the holidays."

"Point taken. Based on what Rumple told us, we should look at Selma Quickly. She could've gotten a few of her friends to rob people in the town to distract us from finding the Browns but we have to tread lightly. One wrong move and we lose that family."

"Still no activity at the shop, Emma."

"I'll go over there myself and talk to Cedric. I can say I'm working on the aging potion for the kids while you two handle the robberies." Emma summoned her map of the town from her desk drawer and unrolled it. "Most of the robbers took place in this area." She drew a large circle on the map.

"Then they must be hunkering down near there," Nick said. "But we already did a house to house and no one saw anything."

"Okay…let's widen the grid. Start here and work your way out. I want every inch of this town covered and I'll call my dad and two other deputies in to help you out along with Ruby. She's a damn good tracker and so is my mother. While Cedric's distracted I'm gonna teleport over to his house and get items from the missing family. Once I send them to you, give them to Ruby and have my mom go with her. She picks up a scent, you move in."

"Got it, Em. C'mon Molk, let's get movin."

That evening, Bae, Beth, Peri and the children put on their warmest clothing and set out on what the Nevengers called Operation: Fix Christmas. Many of the residents were still upset over the loss of their Christmas gifts but hearing a group of children singing some of their favorite Christmas carols helped lift their spirits. As they were singing Rumple, Henry and Regina were setting up wards on all of the houses and some of the other children wanted to go caroling with them.

As they approached a one story blue house they saw a note taped to the door. Killian walked up to the door and began to read. "Carolers…will be….crit…crit…sized?"

"Carolers will be criticized? Ummm….think we better skip this house dearies. Whoever lives here sounds like a real grump," Rumple suggested.

"I agree with Rumple. Let's skip this one!" Regina said.

"No, they're prolly mad cause their gifts got stolen. I'm gonna sing whether they want me to or not!" Belle insisted.

"Dunno how to spell either," The Professor pointed out. "Criticized has a 'z' in it not an 's."

"For someone from Europe that is the correct spelling, Anne," Beth spoke up. "They spell a lot of words differently."

Killian rang the doorbell, all of them confused by the sound emitting from it.

"What the heck kinda doorbell is that? Sounds like somethin' grinding?" Willie asked.

They also heard the song Pretty Woman being played on an electric guitar.

"Oh my God that sounds awesome!" Killian exclaimed. Belle rang the doorbell again.

A man in his late fifties wearing sunglasses, a white t-shirt, a black hoodie, and sweatpants poked his head out the door. There were also red plush deer antlers on his head.

"Hi!" Belle said cheerfully. "I know your sign says we're gonna be criticized but can we sing carols for you anyway?"

"Ummm…"

"Did you play Pretty Woman?" Killian asked him.

"Yes," he answered in a Scottish accent.

"That was so awesome! Can you play something else…like Eruption by Van Halen?"

The man smiled. "Well dude, I'll see if I can remember it," he said and began to play. Killian tapped his foot along with the music.

"Now can we sing?" Belle asked once he was finished.

"Yes, you can sing."

The man was still smiling as he listened to the children singing. It had been a difficult year for him, losing two people he cared for deeply but it was time for him to stop hiding in this obscure American town and get back to travelling the stars and he now had at least one good memory to take with him. "I'll be leaving town soon…moving away on business but who knows…I might come back someday."

"Hope you do. What's your name?"

"Smith, Doctor John Smith."

"I guess we'll see you around dearie." Rumple reached for his hand and shook it. "You won't be alone for long, Doctor," the toddler added and winked at him. Mr. Smith nodded.

"Goodbye kids…and thank you."

They heard the grinding noise again and the house was now vacant.

They made several more stops on that street before turning down the next one, encountering Snow and Ruby. Ruby held a blanket in her hand.

"What're you guys doin?" Bae asked.

"Emma has us tracking the Browns," Snow said. "Molk, Charming and Nick are a few blocks down.

"You pick up the scent yet, Ruby?" Rumple asked her. She shook her head.

"Then come with us…we're caroling 'cross as much of the town as we can."

"It'll be a good cover if ya pick up anything," Bobby added.

"That's a good idea…come on, Snow!"

The pair followed the group down to the next street.

Back at the shop Emma took Cedric into the backroom with her while she was working on the potion. "Mr. Brown, we know what's going on and we're going to help you."

He panicked. "Y….You can't…they'll hurt my family!"

"Listen to me…that is NOT gonna happen, okay! I've got my deputies all over town searching for them and the robbers. The robbers are the ones who took them, aren't they?"

He nodded. "They told me I had to work here so that I could help them remove Mr. Gold's stock."

"Then that's exactly what you're going to do. Let them take it out."

"But…but…"

"Mr. Brown, I need you to keep calm. You cannot do or say anything to make them think we're on to them. Do you know where they're keeping Evangeline and the kids?"

"No…Selma has them but she's not staying at her house…"

"We're gonna find them…one way or another."

"How?"

"Ruby has their scent now…she and my mother can track them and if that doesn't work we have some items in here with locator spells on them. I'm gonna show you which ones they are and I need you to make sure they go with these guys when they come to pick them up. I'll be right here if you need me but you won't see me." She cast an invisibility spell. "They won't be able to see or hear me…but you will be able to hear me."

"Okay."

They heard a car door close.

"You're on, Cedrick. Now remember….keep calm."

"Right….right…"

Two of Selma's associates sauntered into the shop. "Truck's in the back. Let's get it loaded. The Golds are too busy goin around town singing carols."

Emma was grateful her targets couldn't hear her laughing at the thought of her husband singing. He couldn't to save his life.

 _Oh I bet you've had a few doors slammed in your face, Bae and this has to be one of my mother-in-law's schemes. She tried it last year._

Three more men showed up and in that hour they'd taken a large portion of Rumple's stock including six items that had been enchanted with locator spells. Once they drove away Cedric sat down on the cot and buried his face in his hands. "What if this doesn't work?"

"It will!" Emma said firmly. "Come with me."

They went outside and Emma pressed her hand to the pavement. A glowing set of tire tracks appeared on the road. She raced to her Bug with Cedric Brown at her heels. "I'm going with you!"

"Listen up everybody! The tracer spell's been activated on the items from Rumple's shop. I've got a set of tire tracks I'm following. Dad, you're closest to me so meet me near Marco's shop. I want all units to converge we find the end of the trail and keep in mind we have a family being held captive. Removing them from the scene safely is priority one!"

The Nevengers approached a small cottage. Belle rang the doorbell hearing "You're a Mean One Mister Grinch" play. The door opened and a creature with green fur dressed in an old Santa suit opened the door.

"Holy crap! The REAL Grinch? Really?" Devon Molk exclaimed.

"That is SO cool! Bobby, I can't believe we're meeting the REAL Grinch. Wait till we tell Daddy!"

"He's not gonna be shocked, Annie. He's meetin all kinds of story people here."

"Oh did Daddy and I forget to mention that?" Beth giggled. "Hello, Mister Grinch. You may not remember me but I'm Phillip and Aurora's daughter."

"Oh, yes Rose. And hello to you, Baelfire. It's been a long time since I've seen you."

"Yeah," Bae chuckled. "I thought you were still living in Whoville."

"Oh, we came over here during the summer but you were out of town."

"Hi, Mister Grinch. You wanna hear us sing the Who Christmas song?"

"You know I would, Belle," He winked at her. Elsa wriggled in her mother's arms.

"Mister Grinch, Elsa wants to hug you like her plushie," Cami explained.

"Jasper, he goes by David now, has been reading your story to our kids since they were born and our littlest one…well…you're one of her favorite characters," Beth explained. The Grinch took the baby in his arms and held her while the children sang.

"If your heart wasn't three sizes bigger now Emma woulda thought you stole Christmas again and locked you up," Killian said once they finished. The Grinch frowned.

"It wasn't me but I hope she finds out who did," he said angrily. "My Who friends are very upset. If there's anything I can do to help, you just let me know."

"We might need to borrow your old sled dearie." Rumple said.

"Oh? What for?"

"Cause if we find the stuff they took we gotta get it back to them before Christmas!"

"My sled's a little small…"

"Not for us!" Regina declared. "We can make it Santa sized! Just gonna need you to drive it!"

The Grinch laughed. "If your ahhhh….if Bae doesn't mind."

"He's not gonna mind. Are you, Bae?" Rumple demanded, giving his son his Stubborn As Hell Face.

Henry laughed. "He's got you there, Dad."

"Yeah yeah, rub it in. Okay, Rumple. But ONLY if you let the Grinch drive."

"I'll be happy to drive it."

"Thank you, Mister Grinch."

"You're welcome, Regina."

"Okay guys, we better get back home."

"Regina, look! Tracks from our spell!" Rumple pointed to a glowing set of tire tracks on the ground.

"They're pointin to that dumpy ole house! That's gotta be where the Browns are! Bae, we gotta go over there!"

"No, we're gonna call Emma."

"Bae, we don't have time to wait!" his father insisted. "Emma's prolly on the other side of town. Listen, we can 'stract whoever's in the house while you an Henry get the Browns out. S'what we were doin in the first place."

"What!" Peri exclaimed. "Robert and Anne Carlyle, are you gonna tell me this caroling bit is you going on another one of your adventures!?"

"Ummm…yeah….sorry Mom…" Annie said nervously.

"I'm texting Nick now, Bae." Peri said.

"And I'm sending the address to David. Rumple's right." Beth glanced over at Bae. "We have to try stall them somehow."

"Rumple, you've been using a lot of magic today. I know you are. You're getting tired."

Regina glared at him. "I got enough apple juice in me to kick that pasty witch's butt!"

"And I've got the scent!" Ruby confirmed. "I'll go with you and take you to where the Browns are. Snow, you and Peri and Beth can stay with the kids."

"They could be armed!" Bae protested.

"The hardest enemy to hit is one you can't see. You get me, Henry?" Rumple asked his grandson.

"Gotcha! Get ready to be invisible, Dad!" The trio vanished from sight. "And I remembered to make sure only those we want to can see and hear us."

"Good."

"They can't see the tracks, can they?" The Professor wanted to know. Rumple shook his head. Regina snorted.

"We're not that stupid. C'mon! Time's wastin."

"Emma, I've got a visual on the tracks!" they heard Nick call out.

"Where?"

"Down near the docks!"

"My dad and I are on our way, Molk?"

"Emma….we've got a problem!"

"What?"

"Bae, Beth, Peri and our kids are at the place the tracks are leading to! I'm on my way and sending you the address!"

"Shit!" Emma floored the accelerator. "Better hang on, Cedric! Nick, you haul ass and back up Molk till we get there!"

"On my way!"

Selma was getting ready to go down to the shop when she spotted the child Rumple Gold accompanied by Snow White and two other women. She put on her best face and met up with them. "What are all of you doing out in this weather?" she asked sweetly.

"We're singin Christmas carols!" Belle answered. They were standing in front of her car. While she wasn't looking Regina and Rumple cast a spell that flattened her tires.

"Oh how nice."

"You wanna hear one?"

"Ummm…"

"Please….." She gave her the puppy dog look.

"There's somewhere I need to be."

"Okay…well…have a Merry Christmas."

"Thank you."

They stepped back to allow her to get in her car. As soon as she pressed her foot on the gas pedal she heard a grinding noise. "What the hell? She got out of the car. "How the hell did my tires get flat!"

"Didja forget to put air in 'em. Ya gotta do that in cold weather," Rumple said smugly.

"Shut up, you little smartass! They were full earlier!"

"You better watch that mouth or you're gonna eat soap!" Regina threatened.

Selma glared at her. "And YOU better watch yourself or I'll show you what happens to bad little girls!"

Snow shoved her against the car. "Threaten her one more time, bitch and you're gonna find out what happens to bad big girls!" she snarled.

"I'll take that!" Peri snatched Selma's purse out of her hands and took out a handgun. "Can't risk you firing this around children!"

"I got something better to do with it!" Regina gestured and turned the weapon into a candy cane. "Merry Christmas, Snow!"

"Thanks, Regina!"

David ran up to them panting heavily. "W…What…the heck…are you guys doing!"

"Giving you a hand, what else?" Killian shook his head. "You gonna take that witch downtown?"

"Not before I ask her a few questions. All right Selma, where are the Browns?" he demanded.

"You go fu…."

"I WARNED you!" Regina singsonged as Selma coughed up soap bubbles.

David facepalmed himself. "Regina, couldn't you wait until I got something outta her?"

"She's not gonna talk," Killian spoke up. "They're in that dumpy house. They have to be."

"Honey, go. We'll handle this bitch!" Beth said to her husband.

"Where's Nick?" Peri demanded.

"He was behind me. I hope to hell he gets here soon!" He handcuffed Selma and made her sit in the backseat of her car then drew his gun and raced toward the house.

Meanwhile Ruby, Henry, and Bae snuck around the back, Ruby sniffing the air. "Only catching the scent of the Browns…and someone else….It's Molk. Emma gave me all the scents of all her deputies so I would know the difference. The Browns' scent is coming from the second floor."

"Okay, we better tell Molk." They came back around to the front of the house as David was about to enter. "Only the Browns are inside, Deputy," Ruby informed him. "But I'm picking up the others, not far from here."

"All right, let's get the family outta here." He entered the house, Bae, Henry, and Ruby following suit. Ruby moved forward and led the group to a room at the end of the hall on the second floor. When she opened the door something struck her on the head. She slumped to the floor.

"Oh crap! Miss Ruby, I'm sorry! I didn't know it was you!" Sebastian Brown cried, holding the broken leg of a chair in his hand.

"She's gonna be okay. We gotta get you guys outta here fast!" Henry cried. He teleported Ruby to the hospital with a note for Granny and Doctor Whale explaining the situation. Nick pulled up as they were coming out of the house. "Sorry I'm late, Molk."

"Ruby said she picked up the scent of the others but she's had an accident. Where are Emma and Nolan?"

"They're about five minutes away. Rumple sent Selma down to the station. She'll be cooling her heels in a cell for a while. Come on. We'll find 'em!"

The two men started running toward the docks.

"We did it, we did it! We found the Browns!" Killian cheered and started hugging all of them.

"We KNEW you guys would find us!" Sebastian hugged him back.

"S'not over yet, dearies!" Rumple reminded them. "Those robbers are still out there. C'mon Regina. Mister Molk and Nick are gonna need our help."

"M'getting tired, Rumple."

"So am I," Henry confessed.

"Guys, you better leave this one up to the pros," Bae advised.

"But we wanna help!" Belle protested.

"You've done enough for one day, honey. Let the police do their job," Peri said gently.

"Look!" Willie pointed toward an old warehouse parking lot.

"Oh no not again!" Beth groaned, watching her husband climbing up the back of a trailer in pursuit of his suspect.

"Get 'em Daddy, get 'em!" Jasper and Devon cheered.

The other Nevengers stood beside them, their mouths agape.

Nick, you better be ready on the ground! David thought as they got closer to the edge of the trailer. The two of the split up when their suspects took off in opposite directions. David's suspect Horace jumped off and landed on a pile garbage beneath the first trailer then started climbing up the second trailer.

"Shit!" David cursed. He jumped off his trailer onto the garbage and followed Horace up the second trailer. Here I go again!

"Uh oh…if he jumps off the other one he's gonna get hurt! We gotta help him, Rumple, but we're too tired!" Regina cried.

"We gotta try! Soon as he gets close we'll do a floating spell an bring 'im down!"

Horace jumped off the second trailer yelling in pain and got up to run again.

"Where the heck's your dad?" Jasper demanded of Bobby and Annie.

"He's comin! C'mon Dad! Hurry up 'fore he gets away!"

"Rumple, Mister Molk can't get down! You gotta help him!" Belle pointed to the trailer. Seconds later a slide made of ice appeared in front of it. He slid down behind Horace but before he could catch him Nick came around the corner and tackled the man to the ground.

"Horace Byers, you're under arrest!" Nick growled and hauled him to his feet and took his gun. "You okay, Molk?"

"Yeah….where's the other guy?"

Nick gestured to the second suspect, cuffed to the fence.

"Oh my God that was AWESOME!" Killian exclaimed.

"Yeah but scary!" Belle shivered.

"Daddy's chased somebody like that before," Jasper told them. "Huh Dev?"

"Yep."

"Really?" Bobby asked. "Did he have an ice slide too?"

"Nope. He was stuck on the second trailer. Uncle Eddie tackled the guy an' he an Hildy took him off to jail. Thanks for giving him the ice slide guys," he said to Regina and Rumple.

"We didn't do it."

"Huh? Then how did it get there?"

"Cami did it," Rumple said.

"I did? How?" the little girl's eyes widened with shock.

"Were you thinkin 'bout it, dearie?"

"Umm…I was scared Daddy was gonna fall an I thought 'bout a sliding board…did I really do that?"

"Uh-huh. You got ice powers like Elsa," Rumple answered.

"Cool!"

"But you are going to learn how to control them, Cami," Beth said firmly.

Nick and Molk walked their suspects to the police truck where the other two robbers were waiting. Emma had just pulled up when she and Charming spotted them fleeing the scene in their car. They boxed them in using their own vehicles and took them into custody. "Okay Ben, haul 'em in!" she instructed the deputy driving.

"You got it, Sheriff!"

The robbers could hear the Nevengers singing during the trip to the station.

"They're coming to take you away-hee hee ha ha

To Maine State Pen, twenty years to life,

Where a fat guy named Bubba's gonna make you his wife

If ya don't do as you're told

Ya get chucked into a dark hole

And nobody cares cause you broke the law

And now you're gonna pay

So take them away

Hooray!"

The parents gave their children the Look.

"Now what did I tell you about singin that song?" Nick demanded of his children.

"Not to do it anymore."

"Then how 'bout this?" Rumple suggested. "Breakin' rocks in the hot sun

They fought the law and the law won

They fought the law and the law won

They needed money 'cause they had none

They fought the law and the law won

They fought the law and the law won…"

Emma reached into her pocket and took out the vial holding the antidote to the deaging potion.

"You finished it?" Bae asked her.

She nodded. "I know Miri needs to see her parents, Bae…but I want to have one more Christmas with those rugrats…just one more."

"I know hon but this is Miri's first Christmas too."

She sighed. "You're right. I'll change them back before Christmas morning."

He kissed her. "We still have them till then."

They heard someone clear their throat and turned to face Rumple. "Umm Emma, we said we'd return all the stuff that was stolen and we're gonna cause now we know where it is."

"Okay. Wanna tell me how we're gonna do that."

He beckoned her to lean down and whispered in her ear. "Seriously?"

"Yup!"

"Ummm…well…that's Santa's job."

"We'll write him a note."

Bae laughed. "Oh I can't wait to see how this turns out!"

 **Author's notes: There are several eggs planted in this chapter. Let's see who can pick them all out! Only one more chapter to go and thank you all for continuing to read dearies!**


	5. How the Nevengers Saved Christmas

**~ How The Nevengers Saved Christmas ~**

Once word of the arrests got out, Emma and her deputies were swamped with calls from angry citizens demanding to know where their stolen property was and wanted it back before Christmas. Nick and David took charge of interviewing their suspects while Charming helped his daughter gather evidence at the gang's hideout. They also needed to speak with the Browns, Emma asking Archie to come over to the station in case any of them needed him.

"Emma, where's all the stuff they took?" Rumple asked her.

She frowned.

"Ummm….a lot of the clothes and toys were thrown in the trash. I don't know how I'm going to tell people we can't give them back like that."

"You don't have to, dearie. You can fix it."

"I can?"

"Yeah you can! You got magic like the rest of us and you're good with it. 'Member how to use it!" he scolded.

 _Oh how many times have I gotten a lecture like that when I doubted myself,_ she thought.

"Know you like doin' stuff without it, Emma but sometimes you gotta use magic to get yourself outta a sticky situation and this is a real sticky one. All that stuff in the trash can be fixed with some cleanin' spells and they'll never know. An you have me, Henry and Regina to help."

"Rumple, you and Regina have used too much magic today."

"So I'll sleep good later. Tomorrow's Christmas Eve and that stuff's gotta be back in the houses 'fore everybody wakes up on Christmas mornin'. That's where the Grinch is gonna help us out. We get the stuff cleaned up, wrapped up and we'll drop it off. Save them the trouble of doin it."

She spread her hands helplessly. "How will we know where everything goes?"

"You'll know," he insisted, his eyes meeting hers.

She reached back into her memories of her magic lessons with him, recalling a spell he taught her involving objects and ways that they retained memories.

 _Remember the Once Upon a Time book. The moment you held it, you accessed the memories you had of being in your father's arms just before he sent you through the wardrobe. Objects can retain memories too. You just need to know how to access them. And that is what we're going to learn today._

"Okay, kid. You got me. Let's go get that stuff outta the trash and get it cleaned up."

Everyone met up at her house that night. Many of the victims of the robbers couldn't remember some of the items they purchased but those who planned to give cash, checks, and gift cards wrote down those details for them.

"We were able to find the stolen checks and some of the gift cards but a few of them were used to make online purchases," Nick said. "The cash was already spent too."

"I don't think my father will mind if I replace that," Bae spoke up. "It's what he would've done were he an adult."

"Speaking of that Emma, when are you changing them back?" David asked her.

"Christmas morning," she replied. "They'll spend Christmas Eve with us as kids. Robin already knows about it and he's okay with it. What did the Browns have to say?"

"Plenty that will make sure that crew gets a long prison term. And something that will probably make Cedric and Evangeline rest easier."

"What?"

"They found a will in Rumple's safe from the woman Evangeline worked for…she inherits the entire estate and it's enough that they won't have to worry about money for a while."

"That's odd…why didn't he mention it?"

"I don't know. The will is about ten years old and it's been in the safe a while. He probably forgot about it. Unless she wrote up a new one and changed it."

"I hope not! Did you tell them?"

"No. Don't wanna give them false hope."

"Okay as soon as I change Rumple back I'll see what he can remember."

"Everyone wants their stuff back. How are we gonna handle that?"

"My father's making an announcement that I hope will calm everyone down, Nick. Rumple taught me a spell that will help me trace all the gifts back to the ones they're supposed to go to and the ones that got tossed in the trash will be restored to the condition they were in when they were bought and they'll be wrapped and labeled."

David chuckled. "Is it true the kids asked the Grinch to help them deliver them?"

"Yes, and Rumple insists we go through with it. You know how he is. He doesn't welsh on anything."

Emma was grateful she had three other mages to help her with the spells she needed to cast on the gifts. Snow, Peri, Beth and Belle wrapped them, informing the men and boys that their job would be loading them onto the sled.

"Well we can help wrap too!" Nick protested.

Peri shook her head. "I am not sending out gifts wrapped with the Mirror, Nicholas Carlyle!"

"That was ten years ago! Ye dinna forget anything do ye?"

"No, not when I'm accused of being too cheap to buy wrapping paper."

"Oh it was a joke!"

"Yeah well my mother didn't find it funny."

"Yer mother dinna find anything I do funny. She hates me!"

Bae burst out laughing. "I'm glad my mother-in-law doesn't hate me. I'd have an arrow in my ass!"

"Aurora would've sent the fairies after me and believe me, you didn't want to mess with them, especially Flora! She made Blue look like a kitten!" David spoke up.

They sent the children out of the room while they wrapped gifts for three of the original Nevengers. Bae and Emma bought Belle a Leapfrog tablet with books she could read.

"You still buy them gifts even though you're changing them back?"

"I don't think this is the last time we'll see their child selves but it will be for a while. Belle can also give them to Miri too."

Miri also had plush Beauty and the Beast dolls waiting for her under the tree from her parents and Aria had Little Mermaid ones waiting for her from her grandparents.

"My daughters love their plushies and I had to find out how to dry one of the damn things when Cami put her Elsa doll in the tub with her! Thank God her sister hasn't tried to put her Grinch one in the tub!"

Beth laughed. "It's true! David had to put it in a pillow case and throw it in the dryer. It took two hours!"

"Meanwhile we had an impatient three-year-old upstairs that wouldn't go to sleep unless Elsa was there."

"Guess we better keep that in mind in case Aria wants Ariel to go swimming," Bae joked.

They bought Regina several refill packs for the Easy Bake Oven they'd given her last Christmas. She still used it as an adult and had already pre-ordered its adult counterpart called the CHIP Smart Cookie Oven that had many choices of pre-made dough to use and even offered the option of using homemade dough.

Rumple's gift, that he could use as an adult or a child, was a trip to California's Disney since he'd already seen the one in Orlando and not all his experiences there had been memorable.

Rumple bought his eldest grandson the Warrior series by Erin Hunter and his youngest grandson's gift was a compass that he enchanted himself that would always guide the toddler home if he was lost or the way out of a difficult situation, the perfect gift for the new leader of the Nevengers. Bae and Emma bought both boys the new Nintendo Classic Edition with 30 of the original games preloaded into it. Even Bae was excited to play some of his old favorites like Donkey Kong and Super Mario Brothers.

Bae was planning on surprising his wife with a vacation for just the two of them in Hawaii. They certainly needed it after the busy year they had! Emma bought him a new phone, his old one had a cracked screen that he was procrastinating about getting replaced and a laptop that he could use at work.

Rumple had his son pick up a little perfume lab set for Regina where she could make her own fragrances and bottle them. Emma suspected she would use this as adult too and his gift to little Belle was a Belle doll. The Nevengers were given advanced notice of new releases from Disney. A new one was being released to promote the film but the young mage cringed in horror when the preview Belle doll arrived.

"M'not givin Belle that! Looks like they took the head off a Justin Beiber doll an stuck it on Belle's body!"

"Ummm…kinda…" Bae was trying not to laugh.

"An what's with the age spots?" the little sorcerer demanded. "Belle don't have age spots! If I was that Emma Watson girl I'd be suin their butts!"

Bae related the story to the others while Emma was wrapping the doll.

"Well he does have a point," Nick laughed. "Thank God you managed to get one of the good ones."

"Oh yeah and that father of mine will probably go to every store in town and demand to have those dolls pulled off the shelves when they DO come out. Not that it will take much convincing. If Belle sees that…"

"Mama would have Melanie incinerate them if her dolls looked like that!" Beth said.

"Knowing Belle, SHE'D make Melanie burn those things!"

The Grinch arrived at the house at five PM. Rumple and Regina transformed the sled while the men loaded the gifts.

"Can we sit up front with the Grinch?" Cami pleaded.

"Aww but we wanted to!" Killian protested.

"I have enough room for four," the Grinch said diplomatically.

"How 'bout we draw straws?" Regina suggested.

Rumple glanced over at the Molk children. "Guys, the Grinch is an old friend of their family so we gotta let them sit up front, okay. "Sides, we got gifts to hand out."

"Santa's gonna get mad 'cause we're doin his job!" Bobby pointed out.

"That's why we gotta leave the notes. Didja write it like I told you to?"

"Uh-huh and we're gonna set big plates of cookies and milk out!"

"Okay kids, hop on. I'll have them home by seven," the Grinch assured their parents. Beth carried out Elsa's car seat, Emma casting charms over it to keep the baby warm and to secure it to the seat of the sleigh.

"Emma, make sure you put the note out if Santa shows up early!" Rumple instructed.

"I will."

A child from each family had been instructed to write a note to Santa Claus for him to find Christmas morning with the following text.

 _Dear Santa,_

 _We're sorry we had to do your job here tonight. Please don't put us on the Naughty List and give us reindeer poop and coal in our stockings! We just wanted to make sure nobody's Christmas got ruined by those nasty robbers. We won't do it again! Promise!_

 _The Nevengers_

Their first stop was Robin's house. Regina ran up to the door.

"ROBIN! OPEN UP! IT's REGINA!" she yelled.

The former outlaw rubbed his head. "Oh I cannot wait until she becomes an adult again. She's gonna make me deaf!" He opened the door to find his wife and son standing on the doorstep with their friends, their arms full of wrapped gifts.

"Daddy we found all the stuff!"

"Oh crap! Roland did you…?"

"No, wasn't allowed to see what you got me."

"You want this stuff under the tree?" Regina asked him.

"Yes."

"Okay! Bring 'em in guys…right there!" She pointed to a spot beside the tree. "Thanks, Roland. Would have you go with us but your dad wants you in bed early."

"Okay. See ya later, Regina!"

Father and son smiled at each other. They would see her again on Christmas morning as her true self.

The Molks delivered their uncle Archie's gifts to him.

"You'll see what's in these tomorrow afternoon," he promised them.

Some of the adults were in tears when they arrived, most of the day they were worried that they would wake up with nothing under their Christmas trees for each other or their children and at each house they stopped by the Nevengers repeated the Grinch's motto.

 _Christmas doesn't come from a store. Christmas means a little bit more._

All their hosts sent them on their way with snacks to eat during their trip as a thank you for returning their gifts to them and saving them the hours of work it would take to wrap and label them. All of the heavy items would be teleported in.

Emma asked them to visit the Browns with a special gift donated by the parents of the Nevengers. She was hoping Rumple would have another for them as his adult self.

"I can't thank you enough for everything you've done for my family!" Cedric told them.

Rumple handed him an envelope. "This is from the adults."

Evangeline opened it, pressing her hand to her heart. "Oh no…we…we can't.."

"What is it?" her husband asked her. "No! You…you didn't have to do this!"

Inside the envelopes were gift cards and cash that amounted to five thousand dollars.

"It's Christmas. No one should be without on Christmas," Belle said.

"And these are from us! Bring 'em in!" Rumple ordered. The Nevengers stacked four piles of boxes under the family's tree. "They're special boxes and will be anything you want them to be."

"Thank you…." Evangeline sobbed.

"Merry Christmas!" they called out as they were leaving.

The Grinch pulled the sled into Emma and Bae's driveway at 7pm after dropping the rest of the children off at their own homes where their parents were waiting. He would spend the evening at the Molk home.

"Mister Grinch, where you gonna go on Christmas?"

"Oh, I'll be with the Molks for a bit tonight, Killian and then spend Christmas at Cindy Lou's. She always has a special job for me. Do you remember what it is?"

"You gotta carve the roast beast!"

He smiled. "That's right. Goodnight everyone."

"Goodnight, Mister Grinch and thank you!" Each Nevenger gave him a hug as he was leaving and thanked him again for his help.

"Okay you rugrats, get in here! Present time!" Bae called out.

"We're not gonna wait till tomorrow?"

"No, Rumple. You guys have other things you do tomorrow. Why don't you hand out your presents first?"

He handed Belle hers first. She unwrapped it and squealed with delight when she found a Beauty and the Beast Enchanted Christmas Belle doll inside.

"I really wanted this one! Thanks, Rumple."

Killian snickered.

"What you laughin at?" Rumple asked angrily.

"Do you wanna show her, or should I?"

"Aww man don't tell me you took that thing outta the trash!"

"What're you talkin about?"

"Ummm…ummm…Belle….'member how Disney said when they come out with new stuff they send us a sample?"

"Yeah? So?"

"Well ahhh…they're makin a new Belle doll for the movie…"

"Oooh didja get me one?"

"Ummm yeah…but…Belle you really don't want it!"

"Yes I do!"

"No ya don't," Killian giggled.

"Yes I do! C'mon Rumple, lemme have it!"

"Belle, really you don't want it!"

"Rumple, you're mean! Lemme have it!"

Regina was laughing so hard she nearly fell off the sofa. "You heard her, Rumple…let her have it!"

He groaned, cast a cleaning spell and handed her the FedEx box he threw it in.

"Don't say I didn't warn you, dearie!" he grumbled.

She tore off the tape and peered into the box, her blue eyes wide with horror. "This some kinda joke, Rumplestiltskin? Didja take the head off one of those Justin Whatcha Call Him Dolls and stick it on a Belle body?"

"No! That's the doll they're makin! I swear. Here's the letter they sent me!" He handed the letter to her. She read a few sentences and ripped it up.

"This is the worst Belle doll I ever seen and a disgrace to the Belle name!" she ranted. "It DOES look like they stuck that guy's head on a Belle body and gave it old age spots too! Too bad you're not big 'cause I woulda told ya to SUE them good for this crap!"

"Toldja you wouldn't want it," Killian taunted.

"You bet I don't. It's goin right back in the garbage!" She threw the doll back in the box and dumped it in the trashcan.

Regina handed Belle her gift. "Oooh you got me a Funko doll! Thanks, Regina."

"She matches your big doll so you have little 'Chanted Christmas Belle an Big Belle."

When she opened Killian's she found a second Funko doll wearing the gold dress. "Now you got a little Gold Belle for Big Gold Belle."

"I can play them as Mommy and daughter. Thanks guys!"

"This one is from us, Belle." Emma handed her the box with the LeapFrog tablet and books in.

"Leapfrog! I wanted one of these too!"

"We know you did and there are plenty of books to keep you busy!" Bae said with a grin.

"Okay Killian, you're next," Rumple declared and handed his grandson his gift. The former pirate's eyes lit up when he opened it and found the compass.

"Oh cool."

"It's a special compass. You're never gonna get lost again or not know how to get outta a tough Nevenger 'venture cause it has stuff I put in it to help you out."

"Thanks, Rumple! This is awesome!"

"You make sure you carry it all the time, okay?"

"I will!"

"Had a hard time tryin' to figure out what to get ya, Killian but Henry helped me out," Regina said sheepishly.

"Oh yeah! Super Mario U! I've wanted to play this since I saw somebody playin it on YouTube!"

"Had to have them help me pick out mine too but it goes with what Regina got you," Belle said with a smile.

"Super Mario 3D World! That was the other game I wanted. Awesome! Thanks, Belle!"

"That's the one where we can all play, right?"

"Yup!"

"This is for you and Henry but he wants you to open it," Emma said.

"The old Nintendo? No way!"

"Way!" Bae grinned. "Now you can play some of the old-school stuff…but I'm the best at it. It's a smaller version of the old Nintendo."

Henry laughed. "You think, Dad! We can play old school huh, Killian?"

"Yep. 'Specially Super Mario."

Rumple handed Regina the box with her perfume making set.

"Yay! Now I can make stuff that doesn't stink like a French ho!"

Emma facepalmed herself. "Regina!"

"It's true…or it stinks like that Ew De Toilet or something."

"Or make something for guys that doesn't make them stink." Belle made a face. "Like that Axe crap."

"I could. Robin wears that crap. Thank God he doesn't have a wife or she'd kick him out for stinkin up the house."

Henry, Bae and Emma burst out laughing.

"What?"

"Nothing!" Henry cried.

"Oh I cannot wait till she turns back to her adult self. It's gonna be hilarious!" Bae whispered to Emma.

"Poor Robin's not gonna know what hit him," she muttered.

"Belle! You got me the Evil Queen Funko! Nice!"

"Henry said you wanted one."

"I did!"

"Know how you like all the bad girls in Disney so mine goes with Belle's." Killian said. She opened it to find a pack of Funko minis featuring Maleficent, Ursula and the Evil Queen.

"Ooh now I have big Evil Queen and little Evil Queen!"

"And here are ours, Regina."

"Cool Henry! You got me more stuff for my oven!"

"We do know how you love using it!"

"Yep! Gonna make all kinda stuff!"

"Your turn now, Rumple." Bae handed him a large manilla envelope. He opened it up, his eyes wide with shock.

"We're gonna go to the other Disney?"

"Yes but this time as a real vacation!"

"Yay!" Rumple hugged his son and daughter in law then his grandsons. "When we gonna go?"

"This summer. It's all set."

"It's gonna be the best vacation ever!"

Belle shuffled her feet nervously. "I couldn't decide which one I wanted to get you more so I got you two things."

"Sev!" he cried, unwrapping a Severus Snape Funko doll. "Gonna miss Sev." He waved his hand over the tip of his cane and held it up as it glowed with a bright white light. Then he unwrapped the second package and found a Beast Funko doll inside. "Now your Belles have a beast!" he joked.

"Holy crap, Rumple, he's got a harem! Lucky stiff!" Killian exclaimed. Henry spit his soda out through his nose laughing.

"Killian!" Emma gasped.

"My turn!" Regina shrilled, handing Rumple her gift.

"A Sev plushie! Thanks Regina!"

"Now you have a big Sev for your little Sev."

"Yeah don't want him to be lonely," he said softly.

"They don't have a Lily, Rumple, or I woulda got you one so I got you Harry instead," Killian explained after Rumple unwrapped the Harry Potter doll.

"Yeah Harry should be with Sev," Rumple said.

Emma brushed tears from her eyes as the evening drew to a close.

"Why you cryin, Emma?" Rumple asked.

"Oh…ahhh…it's nothing," she lied. "Santa ahh…said he was gonna be a little late tonight so you guys can stay up til midnight."

"He's not mad at us?"

She shook her head. "Why don't we watch some movies until then?"

They spent the rest of the evening on the sofa watching some of their favorite Christmas movies, the children drifting off to sleep. Emma went into the kitchen and poured the antidote to the aging potion into their cups and filled it with warm milk.

 _I have to let go…for now,_ she thought.

Henry had already taken Killian up to bed, explaining to him that they were changing his grandparents back to their adult selves. He was sad to see his old friends go again yet still happy that his grandparents would be back.

"Okay you guys, time for you to go to bed like Killian but this should help."

"Warm milk. Good. Don't wanna wake up 'fore Santa gets here or he'll really be mad," Rumple muttered.

Moments later they were sitting on the sofa as their adult selves again.

"Oh damn! I hate to rush off but I've got an impatient outlaw at home!" Regina cried and hugged Emma. "We'll be over in time for dinner."

"Gonna hold you to that you know!"

"Make sure you use that perfume lab on him, Regina!" Belle reminded her.

"I will. After I confiscate his Axe and banish it to the void!" she laughed as she was walking out the door.

They heard Miri crying from the nursery. "That's our cue, Rumple. I'll go get her," Belle said softly. "And you have something to do, don't you?"

He nodded.

"Papa, are you and Mama going home?"

"No Bae, we'll stay here and spend Christmas night at home," his father answered. "But first I have an errand to run."

"Rumple, there's something I wanted to ask you…David found a will in your safe…" Emma began.

"It's an old one. The new one is in the safe at the house. I didn't want to risk Vicki Parker finding it. Not that she would be able to. Maura always intended for her fortune to go to her best friend's daughter and that didn't change. I hope Cedric is still awake. Tell Belle I'll be back!"

He vanished in a puff of smoke.

Over at the Brown house Cedric and Evangeline were still reeling from the shock of the generosity shown to them by the Golds and their friends. They had enough to get them through Christmas and January but still worried about the future. Then they heard a tapping on their window.

"Cedric it's Mr. Gold…and he's an adult again!"

"Why he is out so late?" he wondered. "Mr. Gold, what brings you here?"

"A few things…the first to say that I'm glad you're all together again."

"I'm sorry for lying to your son…"

"Desperate times call for desperate measures, dearie. I know that too well. Which brings me to the second reason for my visit. My shop. I'd like you to stay on."

"Y…You would? But what about Mr Wheems….?"

"You can return to work at the funeral home if they need you back but it would be better if you had a job that was more stable. My shop can offer you that and there'll be no trouble with Wheems and Jowels. They'll understand."

"Mr. Gold…I…I don't know what to say."

"You don't need to say anything, dearie. I've been where you are, a man trying to do the best he can for his family and I never want to see anyone struggle as I did again. And Evangeline, I know you remember Maura Parker and your mother were very old friends."

"I do."

"Maura never forgot that and made your mother a promise that she would take care of you." He reached into the side pocket of his overcoat and took out an envelope. "She kept that promise by making you the sole heir to her estate."

"What? W…What about her daughter?"

Rumple shook his head. "A daughter who never paid her any mind unless she wanted to borrow money? No, dearie. You were more of a daughter to her than that shark."

"I…I can't believe it!"

"You can believe it, dearie. I was with her when she wrote out both versions of her will. They didn't change in the ten year gap between them. What did change was the value of the estate. I am well aware Maura kept her original draft of the will at the house in case Vicki decided to do some snooping but the original was in my possession. Neither of you will have to struggle again."

Evangeline threw her arms around her husband weeping joyfully. "Cedric…."

"I'll leave you to enjoy the rest of your holiday but I will need to meet with you after the holidays to finalize everything."

She nodded. "Thank you! Thank you so much."

"Merry Christmas!" he said and vanished.

He returned to the Victorian, summoning his and Belle's gifts for the family and each other from their hiding places, snickering at the burn marks on his front doorstep. He fixed it with a flick of his wrist. As he was walking out the door he spotted David and Elizabeth Molk standing out on their porch sipping cups of cocoa.

"Back to your old self again I see," David joked.

"Without the gold flecked skin and leather but yes," Rumple laughed. "So, how are you liking Storybrooke so far?"

"It's quieter, just the way we want it."

"Better get to building a clubhouse after the holiday. Your wee ones are gonna need it and I'd like to start the childrens' magic lessons after the holidays."

"At least we know they'll be safe here."

"They will be," he assured them. "I must be going."

"Good night, Rumple!"

Belle was waiting up for him with Miri when he teleported back to his son's house along with Bae and Emma. Emma was sitting on the sofa sipping her own cocoa enjoying watching her husband struggling to put some of the toys they bought Aria and Killian together.

He took his daughter in his arms and kissed her small cheeks. "Papa missed you, dearie. Oh and Bae, isn't payback a bitch?"

"Very funny, Papa! Emma, what the heck language are these directions in?"

"It would help if you weren't holding the paper upside down," she laughed.

Miri buried her small face in her father's shoulder while she listened to him reciting an old Scottish poem.

"Sleep well me bairnie sleep

The lang lang shadows creep

The fairies play on the munelich brae

An the stars are on the deep…"

"That's beautiful, Rumple," Belle said softly.

"I recorded it in case we turn into kids again at some point so you and Bae can play it for her, Emma."

"I think we'll play it for Aria too. She loves hearing her grandpa's voice before she goes to bed."

"Are you gonna turn into kids again for your Disney trip?"

Belle and Rumple shook their heads. "No, not for a while. And I meant it when I said we're all going…and I do mean everyone. Hopefully the kids won't get into any adventures this time."

"Well, we're gonna hit the sack. Night, Rumple," Emma hugged her in-laws.

"Yeah I'm tired from all that work," Bae groaned. She scowled at him.

"Really, Gold? I had more to do last year!"

"Okay, okay, don't smother me in my sleep!" He threw up his hands in defeat.

"Make it up to me."

"Ye better be done before my grandsons go in to wake you up! I dinna want a repeat of last year!" Rumple shook a finger at them.

"We will. Night, Papa!" Bae called out, grabbed Emma's arm and raced upstairs.

"Finally!" Belle exclaimed, grabbing Rumple by the collar and pulling him over to the archway where a strand of mistletoe dangled. "We have our own little celebration to do tonight, darling," she whispered and kissed him softly.

"That we do," he murmured. "Now…what's that you just put in my pocket?"

"Open it and find out."

Inside the box lay a ring with the symbols of a spinning wheel and rose engraved in them made from pieces of his own spun gold that she collected on the sly.

"So this is what you were doing with the leftovers I didn't use! I thought you were sweeping them up and throwing them in the trash."

"I remembered the first thing you taught me when I came to your castle: one person's trash is another's treasure and I didn't miss the hidden meaning in it." He turned the band over and read the inscription. _My treasure now and always, love Belle._

He sipped the band onto his finger and kissed it. "And you will always be one of my treasures, Belle."

He held out a gift box wrapped in blue foil paper with a handmade bow. "Oh…oh! Rumple, it's beautiful!"

"My child self and my adult self agreed that it's time my Belle started collecting all this merchandise made for her…except that horror I threw out earlier but this one is special."

There was no question as to why. The doll was an exact replica of her, even wearing her gold dress that Rumple made himself. There was even a small diamond engagement ring and wedding band on her finger. She smiled when she found other dolls in the box, a baby Miri, Bae, Emma, Henry, Killian, Aria and one of her husband wearing his finest Armani suit and a little Funko doll of him in his leathers with green skin and a wicked grin on his small face as he held his dagger.

"And my Belle couldn't be without her family."

"No I couldn't!" She cried and kissed him again. "Merry Christmas, Rumple."

"Merry Christmas, Belle."

Though he missed their child selves, Killian was still excited to see his grandparents on Christmas morning.

"Oh and I found this next to the cookie plate this morning," Rumple said with a grin, handing his grandson one of the notes he'd written and sent to the houses of the new Nevengers.

 _Dear Nevengers,_

 _Thank you for helping me out this Christmas. We ran into a little problem at the North Pole and were worried we wouldn't make it on time to deliver all the gifts. Also be sure to pass along our thanks to the Grinch._

 _PS: The cookies and milk were delicious and you will stay off the Naughty List as long as you keep being good boys and girls. I don't like delivering stockings with reindeer poop in them anyway. It stinks._

 _Santa_

"Cool! Santa's not mad!" He noticed his sister struggling to unwrap a large gift. "You need help, Ari?"

"Killy help!"

"Okay. Here, Ari. You just take your fingers and rip it like this."

Pieces of wrapping paper flew everywhere while they worked. "Killy! 'Maid!"

"Uh huh. You got a big Ariel!"

"Anpa! 'Maid!" She attempted to pick it up.

"She's a little to big to carry right now sweetie but you can hug her," Belle said softly.

"'Maid sing?" She asked hopefully.

"Ummmm…well…no…"

Seconds later they heard the doll singing Part of Your World in Jodi Benson's voice. "Maid sing now," she giggled. Rumple placed his hand over the doll's head, enchanting it with the same spells as Killian's compass. His own daughter's plush doll would also be enchanted, sending signals to him, Emma and Henry if either child was in danger.

Knowing they planned to gift each other with a trip to Hawaii, Rumple and Belle bought Bae and Emma a new set of luggage to take with them, Bae laughing when he recalled his father's remarks about their luggage as his child self during their Disney trip.

 _"Bae, you're gonna lose all your stuff in bags that old and that gym bag stinks like dirty socks so all your stuff in there's gonna smell. Why didn'cha wash it?"_

"At least now I won't have to worry what's lurking around in your suitcases."

"Still taking my old gym bag, Papa. Has sentimental value."

"Well it's not going anywhere until it gets washed!"

The Nolans and Hoods arrived at noon. After exchanging gifts, Snow and Regina joined Rumple and Belle in the kitchen to help with dinner. The Golds insisted on cooking the dinner themselves to give Emma a much needed rest after her busy week. Once in a while Bae would try to sneak into the kitchen to grab a quick sample before he was chased off by his mother and mother in law.

"One more time, Gold, and you can forget about getting any of these!" Regina said, pulling a tray of cookies out of her Easy Bake. She set several batches aside, conjured a set of cookie tins and sent them to the homes of the other Nevengers. "That goes for you too, Outlaw!" she yelled, running after her husband when he grabbed one of the extra tins. "Hood, you give that back or you'll be spending the New Year sleeping out on the porch!"

"Come and get me!" He taunted.

"Snow, watch the oven, would you?"

"Sure!"

Bae seized the opportunity and grabbed one of the other tins forcing their wives to pursue them outside. "Baelfire Gold, you give us back that cookie tin or I'll be repeating the clothesline incident!" Emma threatened.

"What's that?"

"Watch and learn, Your Majesty," Emma said. She gestured and two hooks came down from the roof of the porch catching Bae and Robin by the seats of their pants, yanking them off their feet.

"What the hell! Em! Not out here!"

"Now you wriggle them around like this," she went on.

"My ass feels cold….!" Robin complained.

Regina laughed wickedly. "I like this!"

"Knew you would."

"Okay, okay, we give up! Now can you please let us down and fix our pants so we don't freeze?" Bae pleaded. Little did they know Henry witnessed the incident from the living room window and recorded it. Emma lowered the lines and fixed their clothing while Regina snatched the cookie tins out of their hands. "Won't be stealing any of my cookies before dinner again, will you?"

"No," they grumbled. When they went into the house Henry was playing the video on his phone.

"Aww great! Now he's gonna blackmail us with that for the rest of our lives," Robin complained.

"Yep!" Henry declared proudly.

"Okay everybody, dinner's ready!" Snow called out. They were having turkey and ham with mashed potatoes, turkey gravy, creamed corn and peas with stuffing. Snow also brought over her pumpkin, red velvet and chocolate cake rolls for dessert along with the sliced cranberries, Regina's cookies and a chocolate mousse pie made by Belle. Aria and Miri sat in high chairs beside their fathers happily sampling what items they could eat from their plates though Miri was getting impatient when her father wasn't giving her any of her mother's pie. She reached out and flattened it, smearing chocolate all over his shirt.

"Miri!"

Aria giggled and threw a handful of peas at Bae.

"Hey Missus Tater Head, think fast!" Killian catapulted potatoes at his sister.

"Here we go again!" Emma laughed.

"ROLL BOMBS!" Roland yelled, picking up the basket and throwing rolls at everyone at the table.

Bae grabbed Henry in a headlock and mashed potatoes into his hair. "Gonna turn your hair white early, boy!"

Henry poured cold soda into his father's lap. "You peed yourself!" he taunted.

"Yeah and I'm freezing my nuts off…again! You and your mother!"

Snow and Charming attacked their grandchildren with corn and pea shooters.

Rumple jumped out of his chair and chased Belle around the dining room with stuffing balls while she threw Cool Whip and bits of ham. Robin poured cold gravy down the front of Regina's blouse.

"Ohhh Robin, look up!" she cooed and dumped a plate of corn on his head.

Emma held up her plate as a shield as she fended off attacks from her children and sister in law. "Not gonna get me!"

Charming crept up behind his daughter and dumped peas down the back of her shirt. "Dad!"

"Ha ha! Gotta get up earlier to outsmart your old man!"

The dining room was a disaster once they were finished but there were still enough leftovers to last another day or two. Rumple summoned the cleaning supplies from the closet and he, Belle and Regina cleaned the dining room while, Emma, Bae, Henry and Killian cleaned up the kitchen. 

"This was the second-best Christmas ever!" Killian declared. "Henry, you and Roland wanna play Mario 3D World?"

"Yeah!" The two boys grabbed the extra controllers and sat on the floor next to him.

"I guess this is the last they'll see you as kids, isn't it?" Emma asked her father-in-law.

"Killian has plenty of new friends now that he doesn't really need us around now. The important thing is that he enjoys this second childhood he has and we're all here to help him do that. A child shouldn't have to grow up too soon like we all did," Rumple answered. Regina and Belle nodded in agreement.

"We got to experience what a wonderful childhood was like with you Emma and that's nothing something we'll ever forget," Regina reassured her.

They sat down on the sofa watching their children and grandchildren play, smiling to themselves as they looked back on their own adventures with them as children, thinking that even though their second childhoods had come to an end, there was no better time to be a child than on Christmas.

 **Author Notes: We hope you enjoyed this latest installment of the Mishap series. We may eventually write another one but for now we'll be taking a break to finish some of our other projects. Happy New year and happy reading! Snapegirlkmf and CJ Moliere**


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